Flame
by Mrs.Black89
Summary: Team Bethyl this is for you, my first fic ever. She was shot, gone...right? Daryl's flame in the darkness is still burning bright and determined to find him. Adult language and lemons. Detailed description inside.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello hello my lovelies!**

**You will all have to be very patient with me as this is my first story ever! I am an avid reader of many talented authors on here but I've never had the courage or really the mojo to write my own. It could be terrible and I didn't even know if I should share it with anyone at first but here it is with some background info to begin.**

**First of all, I am 150% Team Bethyl! So if they're not your cup of tea proceed with caution you've been warned.**

**Also, I know they may seem OOC at times however, I'm starting where I've chosen because I believe the events that have transpired would change them somewhat/make them realize certain things.**

**I always go back to an interview with Norman and he said that he never thought that Daryl would just jump Beth's bones in the funeral home, it would never happen like that. And I totally agree with him, he's never had any love or a relationship in any form and especially not with a woman. However, after losing her I think he would realize that he needs to take a chance and even though it's scary and unfamiliar, life is even shorter than it was before. He is going to have to take that leap and I'm not saying rush into it one time but he will need to be a little bit different to make it work.**

**I am not starting off exactly at the end of any specific scene or episode. The midseason finale has happened and part of season five that we have seen already. For instance, part of them will go to Virginia but I cannot kill Tyrese. That was horrible I would've been heartbroken for anyone to go but especially him. It's so tempting to off Noah LOL but if that happened then what did Beth "die" for?**

**Also I am definitely incorporating Morgan quite a bit. I'm not really sure and if anyone is please share your ideas with me, if he was happy or just plain old crazy to see Rick's name on that map. In my world he is just simply crazy because that's who he is LOL but he was also happy. No matter what happened I think that they formed some sort of bond and trust and that Morgan's tired of being alone. He's decided he's going to live without hi family and it's time to make a new one.**

**Again please be patient with me and share any constructive criticism but keep the hate to a minimum this was definitely pushing me to the brink of my comfort zone to post this! To my Team Bethyl and Delusional members I hope this does our couple justice!**

Gone. She's just gone. I never would've thought all those weeks ago talking to Rick that I was almost foreshadowing what was going to happen to her.

The bigger part of me, the stubborn part, always just told me I would get her back. To be honest, the cocky part of me was always there too being pushed by the guilt that was slowly -and now rapidly- eating away at me from the inside out.

And along with stubborn and cocky Daryl, another small part of me, a part that had never been touched, never been used my whole life not only told me I would get her back but needed her and wanted her back. That part of me would not exist anymore without her. And that part was going to deal with the rest of those feelings once she was here. Safely in my arms.

And here I am, I did get her back, she is in my arms. I feel the warm weight of her in my arms, against my chest and the soft blonde hair on her head brushing my chin. But all of those things are blurry background images and noises in comparison to the stark contrast, the screaming noise of her blood on my arms. The blood that tells me I failed, that tells me that even though she's in my arms, this time she truly is gone.

A sound brings me out of my own selfish wallowing thoughts. Maggie's heartbreaking wails and screams. I don't even remember seeing her, Glenn, Abraham, Tara, Rosita and Eugene until now. But hearing those sounds coming out of her makes me realize that Beth's death will change our group more than any other loss we've experienced. She was always everyone's bright spark and hope. Carrying on her father's light that we all relied on more than I think we'd like to admit. The only light to ever shine in the dark abyss (can't even call it a simple small tunnel) that is my life.

I don't think that anyone who is still existing -I refuse to call this living- in this pathetic piece of shit excuse for a world ever needs an extra reminder that life isn't fair. Before the turn I think most levelheaded people realized that life is unfair but these days you get the hard slap of a reminder all the time. And usually at the worst times. As if holding her lifeless body in my arms wasn't enough to make me realize that now and remember it until the day I die, a small herd of those fucking walking corpses is coming our way. I already know I will have to leave her behind, that she won't get the burial that she deserves. Just like her father...

She put her life at risk and lost it for another person at the end of the goddamn world and I'm going to have to leave her in the parking lot of a hospital with people inside that helped to take her. Take her from me.

Between our weakened states, some physical and some emotional, the roar the fire engine (where's the bus?), even if I did miss its arrival and Maggie's sobs there is no way to get rid of this herd. We have to run and fast.

I look around as quickly as possible for anywhere that I could leave her. I refuse to let them have her. The only silver lining to this is that the bullet went straight through her head and there's no way that she'll turn and none of us have to be the one to take care of that problem. I'm definitely grasping at straws trying to find anything positive about this but I don't know if anyone would've been able to do that to her.

As these thoughts are going through my head I'm still scanning our immediate surroundings for somewhere to put her. Theres an area off to my left behind some regular chicken wire fences that would've been there before the turn but have been slightly reinforced and are in good looks like the side area of the hospital, perhaps it was a staff entrance or somewhere for laundry who knows and I could give a flying fuck anyway but the gate opens and has a latch on the inside that I can get my hand through and close so they won't be able to get to her.

I can feel Rick watching me. He knows that I would need to do this for any of us but I already can tell that he knows this is effecting me more than anything or anyone else ever has.

Glenn must also have some sort of a sixth sense along with Rick because he gets Maggie to me before I can even think about standing up to make my move to get Beth's body safe. Maggie wraps her arms around her sisters body sobbing into her hair kissing her face, apologizing and murmuring words of endearment and sadness and then it becomes unintelligible. I hate that their goodbye has to be so short and so fucking awful but I have to get her to that area now or it won't happen.

I run over and gently put her on the small set of steps leading up to a side door that looks securely shut and I hear no moans and groans of corpses from behind it after a quick and hard thump of my fist. After I lay her down, I gently brush my hand across her beautiful face and say my last goodbye to her. In the only way I know how. Right before I pull away, I whisper, for her un-hearing ears only "I'm sorry".

Those two words hold so much meaning. I'm sorry for letting my guard down and opening the fucking door, for letting you be taken, for not grabbing your tough little elbow inside that hospital and stopping you from trying to hurt Dawn. And I'm sorry for letting a future for us together fall to pieces before we could even explore it.

Once she's as safe as I can make her I start running to the group, taking down a walker with a knife to the head and another with an arrow I won't get back. Our group separates into the two vehicles we brought with us and we head back to the church. It's time to decide what to do now but I don't know if I even have the will to contemplate any sort of a plan now. To me there is no future, I have never felt this way. Not even the first time I saw the dead rise and start chomping its way towards me. It wasn't until I lost her that I realized there really is no hope left in this godforsaken world.

**Wellll there is it! Chapter 1 and I do have a few more written and ideas floating around in my head. Let me know what you thought!**


	2. Chapter 2

All I can think about right now is the searing pain in my head. I remember falling off of nervous Nellie once before we knew exactly how nervous she was and getting a slight concussion. Daddy, Mama, Maggie and Shawn were so worried about me falling asleep. They all kept such a close eye on me but at the time all I could think about was that I'd love to fall asleep. Damn any repercussions because the pain was unbelievable. However, compared to this white-hot blinding pain, I want to beg God for that concussion back on a silver platter.

But I have to push that to the back of my mind because how am I in pain right now? The last thing I remember was the sound of a gun going off and I'm pretty sure it was in my direction. I know it was stupid and it seemed pointless to go against Dawn but people like her are worse than the walking dead who threaten us daily.

People like her need to be stopped but for some reason we're all too scared to stand up for ourselves or others. If I had to go right then I would much rather have it be standing up for someone and fighting for the little bit of good that's left in this horrible world we live in than by a walker or senseless violence.

All that aside, I just wish I could remember more. I hear a slight beeping and feel the IV in my arm. I can smell the clinical smell of a hospital and I already know, even if I can barely let myself think the thought that I'm still in Grady Memorial in Atlanta.

Was everything a dream? Am I about to wake up and ask Dawn where I am and where Daryl is? Daryl oh Daryl, I can barely think about him, the pain in my heart becomes worse than the pain in my head. I just want know where he is and that he's safe.

Have I gone back in time or is this going to be a reoccurring nightmare for the rest of my life? I'd rather a walker take me out one time than to live in this hellhole of a hospital ever again.

I slowly pry my eyes open to the bright harsh fluorescent lights above me and I can see that I am in the hospital. I have to calm my breathing before I have a full on panic attack, that would help no one. The scenario is already different though, the room is different, it's bigger it's one of the ones with its own bathroom. My clothes are on the bed side table with my knife. I was never allowed anything of my own before. Maybe this is a positive sign? No, I refuse to be hopeful only optimistic. I slowly start to sit up and get a grip of my surroundings, yet again, even though it really just feels like déjà vu.

My inner thoughts are interrupted by the door opening after a slight knock. I know that has definitely never happened. Before, anyone and everyone would simply barge in whenever they felt like it.

It's Dr. Edwards and I don't know if I should feel relieved or scared. Regardless, I am relieved it's not Dawn but part of me knew, somehow it wouldn't be her. I know that I will never see her again but can't explain the feeling. Its a good one though...

He raises both hands in a small gesture of surrender I suppose? He's slowly making his way towards my bed but not too close.

"Hi Beth. Do you remember me?" He says.

"Yes of course I do, why wouldn't I?"

"Well if you don't mind I'd like to ask you some questions and look over your injuries, is that okay?" He says slowly, as if talking to a scared child.

"If you'll tell me what happened and what my injuries are then sure."

"I'll start at the beginning in case any memories are hazy. Your people came back for you and for Carol. You were all about to leave and then Dawn wanted to keep Noah here. You confronted her like she deserved by the way. And even if I go to hell I'll tell the truth, I'm glad she's gone. She's shot you by accident, through your head and then someone in your group shot her. Some of the officers wanted to retaliate for her death. However, Officer Shepard pointed out that this was Dawn's issue and we need to let it go and try and change things." He finishes his almost rambling bout of information.

"Wait, Dawn's dead? How long has it been since this is happened? And why am I here, where are my people, are they here?!"

"I need you to take it easy and relax. I promise to explain everything to you please just stay in the bed and stay still as possible. I haven't checked over your injuries today so I don't know how you're healing." He actually looks worried as he says this to me.

He comes over to me now and starts looking into my eyes with a little light, intently reading the beeping monitors and making notes before he speaks again.

"It happened about two days ago, you've been completely out of it for 48 hours. Luckily some of the officers went out for a run and they found you on the side of the hospital in one of the gated areas that we use to go through to make it to the cars. You were just lying there, I think your people had to leave you quickly. There were quite a few corpses wandering around the parking lot, they must have gotten ambushed and been forced to run. The officers brought you inside to ask me what was the best way to bury you and I had to check your pulse. I know it will never make up for the things that I've done here before you and while you were here but I thought maybe there was a small chance you were still alive. I had seen only a handful of gun shot wounds to the head with a happy ending and that was before the turn. However, sometimes it can that way, as it did with you, go straight through and miss any vitals by mere millimeters. I don't really believe in luck but seeing you here and now well I may have to start. To anyone else you would have seemed dead, your pulse was so weak but we got you into a room and I gave you everything that we had that could help. I was able to give you some morphine but unfortunately I can't give you anymore, we're running so low. But the pain would've woken you up a couple days ago without it. I've been giving you fluids and everything else possible to help you come around. The fact that you're awake and have no memory loss is an amazing and positive sign." He stops talking to ask if he can look at my head wound, I of course consent.

So I survived being shot to the head? Wow, only me.

"But what about my group my family where are they?" I ask, my heart in my throat, I want to see them, please be here.

"I'm so sorry, Beth. We tried to find them but the officers here aren't trained for tracking."

All I can think to myself as Dr. Edwards looks at my head, is that I know someone who can track, better than anyone else. And then the tears come thinking of his strong arms and handsome face and the fact that I may never see him again.

After Dr. Edwards leaves me that morning he said I should take it easy for a few hours, eat lunch and then he'll come back and see if I'm ready for a walk on the ward. Waiting for the food to come and to force myself to eat it and wait for him to come back felt like an eternity. I just wanted to get up, walk around and see how I feel because I need to make a plan of action. I need to find my family.

After I eat he says that if I want to have a shower and then go for a slow walk around the ward he sees no problem with it. After a quick rinse I get changed and put on my clothes and start on my new adventure through the same hospital that seems like a different world now.

After walking for a good 10 minutes and honestly feeling better than I ever thought or hoped to, I can hear man speaking quite animatedly. I'm not usually one to pry but the hospital is a different ballgame now without Dawn around and I need to take in all the information I can. A few seconds later I thank the heavens above for stopping exactly where I was and listening in on the man's conversation with the officer in charge.

I can tell by his voice he's an older man and he's a tough man, you can tell these days by simply looking at someone or hearing them speak for a few seconds how long they've been dealing with the outside world. What really catches my attention is the word Rick. I know that Atlanta is not the only place left in the world, well at least I think I do and I know that Rick is pretty common name but something inside of me tugs myself towards this man as soon as the word leaves his mouth.

"Rick, did you just say Rick?"

The question is out of my mouth before I can fully take in the scene before me. Its the young pretty female officer, Officer Shepard. She's talking to an older black male who still has all his weapons and belongings attached to his body but I see a huge cut on his arm. Not a walker bite but it definitely needs attention, that must be why he's here. I never got to interact too much with this officer and I can tell why, she truly is a good person and the fact that she's in charge now makes me feel better for future survivors that come here, they might get real help.

In the meantime this outside stranger is staring at me like a have four heads. "Yes I said Rick. Why?" He asks me, he's a little defensive and trying to be intimidating. But I don't buy it. Seeing him outside not knowing what's going on sure I know to hide or run the other way but I can read his face from here and I can see that he's just as interested in me as I am in him.

"Well I knew Rick know him I mean. They were here with me about two days ago and an accident and confusion happened and they had to leave. Long story. They didn't know that I was okay. And I want to find them, he's part of the group of ours, part of my family my sister my brother-in-law and I thought if you knew him maybe you were looking for him as well, we could go together?" I have no idea why I'm rambling, spilling my guts to this man Uttering everything I know, everything I hope for, everything I want. He could want to find Rick to kill him for all I know. I'm just so eager and terrified and excited and nervous all at once it's like word vomit. Amd honestly I have no damn time to beat around the bush.

A slow smile appears on his face and then he hands me a piece of paper. I reach for it without a second thought. It's a map and has a route to Washington DC colored in with a note written on it about the New World needs Rick Grimes in it. So that's where they're going, Washington? I never was sure they would want to follow Noah to Virginia and I know there's a reason for this route to the capital. If they're going I will follow.

"Wow where did you find this and I guess I should ask why are you looking for Rick because you'll either be happy to see him or you'll be UNhappy to see him?" Morgan lets out a short but genuine laugh at my question.

"Well I found that map at a church not far from here and I'm not looking for Rick to hurt him or nothin. I don't know if he ever mentioned me to any of your group, I'm Morgan. I found him when he escaped that hospital at the beginning of the turn. And then him, his boy and a woman came back to town and found me again. I can admit I definitely lost it after my wife and then my son passed and I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I set up in our hometown like a crazy man but I have to thank Rick. He gave me a wake up call and after a few months I thought about it, I had to make a decision to live or to die. I decided to live and I don't want to do it alone anymore. You never know who you can trust out there and I'm still open to finding a new crew but when I saw this in a church I thought it was a sign to find that man I've encountered twice at the end of the world and see if I can join him and who he's with. Maybe it would work out maybe not but I don't think there's a lot of fate left in this world and when you find a little bit you have to go with it."

I do remember Rick mentioning Morgan. He talked more about the crazy man with rats in cages for walkers versus the whole saving him at the beginning part though. Regardless, it's like the Morgan read my mind, I think that any little bit of fate left in this world brought me and Daryl together. Who would've ever thought of us escaping the prison and surviving together? Who would've thought of us as a team and him telling me how strong I am and that I'm not a burden and helping me improve my skills? No longer was I just the babysitter. I honestly think that fate would've found us anywhere even before the apocalypse. In a bar that I went to with a fake ID or maybe he would've broken down on his motorcycle near the farm and needed to use our phone. I'm going to tell him this when I see him. I could see the way he looked at me that night, I know he felt the same way I did but his insecurities would outweigh any of those other feelings he has, at first anyhow. But right now I can't let my thoughts drift to him too much, I'll get distracted and I have to stay strong and committed.

"Well Morgan you and I, and I'm Beth by the way, I think we'll get along just fine. I have quite a bit of belief in fate and hope even now. I think a little bit of both brought us both to this hospital. The doctor here says I need to rest for about a week and then I can get going if I want to. So what do you say can you wait and we'll go out there together? I have some skills, I'm good at killing walkers and I can even track a little bit. We could have each other's backs and find them together?" I propose the idea to him and hold my breath waiting for his answer.

I can see him taking the time to seriously think this through. And even though the butterflies in my stomach are flying around like crazy I have to hold onto the hope that he didn't open his mouth, laugh in my face and say no. It feels like years have passed before he answers me. But when he does its exactly what I need to hear.

"Beth I think that sounds like the best idea I've heard in a long time, no one's had my back in too long. Now we only got a week let's get a plan together.

**I wasn't going to post this yet as I still need to keep writing but I got so much support (maybe not to most) on Chapter 1 I had to get this out. Love hearing from you guys! xo**


	3. Chapter 3

**I want to thank everyone who has reviewed so far, especially my guest reviewer. I really appreciate your detailed words, you've definitely helped me out! Enjoy :) xo**

The sun is shining brightly down on all of us, burning our skin like it's taunting us, laughing at us. How could it be so high in the sky, so fuckin bright and happy when the world has ended again, for the second time.

We get back to the church and I don't even think I'll be able to sit in the same state as another person let alone in the small building that was supposed to be for God. I just want to leave and not just the group or the state or the country but the entire rotting surface of a world we are on. And I don't give a shit if I'm bein dramatic. It all seems pointless to me now, but just as I'm about to call it quits and go off on my own even though I know I won't get far with Rick and my other family members around I hear the one thing that can snap me back to attention. Sasha is suggesting that maybe we stay somewhere else nearby the church for a day or two while we decide what we're going to do from here on out. And I realize that it will help, it will make things better (for me at least, and I deserve 5 minutes of selfishness) to not be here after what happened. I don't know why I feel suffocated here but I do. It won't make me feel that much better, nothing but blue eyes and blonde hair appearing in front of me will, but all I can think about is getting away from here.

My mouth is opening and words are coming out before I even realize my brain was giving commands.

"Yeah that sounds like a good idea. If a few of you want to, we can head out soon to clear somewhere out. After we talk to Father over there and see if he can suggest any good places."

Gabriel hears me before anyone can approach him and even though he looks completely shaken by I don't goddamn know, you can see him start thinking.

Maybe it's his stupid little mission -we all know about- to take a stroll around his town as if there aren't dead bodies trying to rip off his head or any other body part they can grab and he's never even killed one before. Or maybe he feels lost, feels our pain and he truly is a man of God even though he let his entire town down. Finally he speaks up.

"Well as I told you they were trying to get out of the primary school when I was near there earlier and there was about two dozen of them. I know for a fact they've broken free and I know there's a chance that they're still there but maybe they caught enough of a whiff of me to leave that area? If they did it might be a good spot, not the school but on the property, in a separate building is a very small library and it was only for the children there. It had nothing to offer but a few desks and chairs of course books so I highly doubt that anyone is in there. It looked intact when I walked by it and like I said it has nothing to offer but it could be a safe place for a day or two, we could board up the windows and bring our supplies with us." He stops and looks around and I think he suddenly feels uncertain about his suggestion but even if he's not my favorite person I have to admit it sounds like a good bet. I don't usually talk first about decisions and stuff, it's not for me and it's not something I enjoy. I usually leave it up to Rick but I'm all outta patience.

"Alright give us the directions, we'll take the truck. Who's comin with me?"

Sasha, Michonne, Glenn and I head out about 15 minutes after we get directions from Gabriel. It's not a huge town to begin with so it should be easy to get to but he also tells us the best way to go and some places we can leave the truck. The less that noise that will attract any walkers that are left the better. And for all we know it could be all 24 and maybe even more at this point.

We leave the truck a few minutes away from the area the school and library are located at and quietly make our way over. He's right, at the front of the school the windows and doors are completely busted, they must've been pushing on that for a long time. And maybe we have finally earned some luck today day or whoever lives upstairs is helping us for once because only 8 walkers are left stumbling around. This is good for now but we could find the herd the rest of them may be very soon but fuck I'll take whatever I can get at this point. 8 walkers between the four of us is nothing, they're killed and piled up to the side in record time. Then it's time to split up, surrounding the library and knocking on windows and it's one door but nothing makes a sound inside or out. Father Gabriel's right again, this place is completely untouched but not in the creepy way Beth and I always felt at the funeral home. This is untouched because it's a small building with nothing to offer unless you were doomsday preppers and could bring all your supplies and secure the place cause otherwise all you'd be doing is reading until you died.

Since there's nothing inside trying to kill us, I look back over at the school and some of the windows are still boarded up and some of the plywood pieces have fallen off already but both will be useful. I tell Michonne and Glenn to get started grabbing some plywood and bring them over, it looks like they should cover the windows fine. In the meantime Sasha and I head inside to make sure it really is empty and to see what we're dealing with.

It's definitely small but nothing we can't handle and it'll be easy to secure and to keep watch. Once we go through the small building and see nothing but the tables, chairs, shelves and books, everything Gabriel told us to expect, we go back outside to help Michonne and Glenn. We're able to secure the windows pretty well and how its situated on the property and near the road we could make an easy getaway even if the plywood didn't hold. Someone who may or may not exist upstairs or luck is definitely with us again because we get this done in enough time to get back to the church and get everyone here just as the sun is setting.

I can feel myself relax the smallest bit once everyone is here and settled. I happily offer to take the first watch with Glenn. Even though he's a good man and I do want to try my best to help him if I can with Maggie I'm glad that we'll be on opposite ends of this building for tonight at least.

Before our watch starts Rick brings us all inside for a quick group meeting. Its good that we're a democracy but I'm happy that he's at the head of it. We talk over our options, Washington DC, Virginia or maybe somewhere completely new. Suddenly, Noah speaks up and I have to give him credit for voicing anything to a room full people he doesn't know. He of course wants to go to Virginia. He doesn't have to say anything for us to know that. Virginia was his home and the last place he ever saw anyone that he loved alive. But, it's what he says next that seals the deal for all of us to agree to send a few members of the group to Virginia. It will be the farthest we've ever been since the beginning of the end.

"Beth, she listened to me and she understood where I was coming from and what I needed and wanted about my family. She said if we ever got out of there together she'd come with me to Virginia. I know she can't do that now and I wish that I was back there instead of her and I'm not telling you this cause I'm trying to change anyone's opinion on what to do but I thought you guys should know that, as her family." He finishes what he has to say and then looks away, sad and lost. I don't know the full nature of his and Beth's interactions, but no matter how platonic or not, the loss of her can make anyone feel the way I do.

The second the words are out of his mouth I can feel as a group, well the original group agree that this should be done. After a few more minutes of talking and making a plan a small group of volunteers speak up and are already planning to head out first thing in the morning with the one map we have left. The one Abraham gave to Rick got lost along the way and God knows where it is and it doesn't matter now that we're all reunited again. Well almost all of us.

Rick and the other volunteers went with Noah to Virginia early in the morning. I don't really know what I think of the outcome of the idea. I was immediately grateful that anyone was going besides Noah himself and it makes me feel better as well that Rick is trying to do something for Beth, in her memory. But part of me can already tell from 500 miles away that there would be nothing left of his home.

I couldn't bring myself to go, the farther I get away from the hospital the more real it is that she's gone and I left her behind and I'll never get a chance to see her again. To get another chance to not be some big dumbass redneck that can't even form a sentence to the one person that's actually made me feel the one thing I've never felt before. I know there was a slim to none chance that the perfect, beautiful, young woman sitting across the table from me was going to say it back or say it period or even feel the same way about me but what's the point of not trying? It's the end of the fucking world, the dead comes back to eat you. You have to risk your life every day just to stay alive I'm pretty sure I could risk a little bit more by telling her how I feel. I actually promised that to myself, that when I found her I would tell her how I felt. Make the words come out of my hick mouth. But that'll never happen, she was ripped away from me and the world too soon.

I'm supposed to be resting after my watch but I can tell Carol is itching to come over and talk to me. Part of me hopes like hell she won't. She was in there with her and I want to know if she saw her, got to talk to her or interact with her before the end. On the other hand, it would be too painful, all I can do is relive how close I was to having her back and all the things I could've done to keep her and didn't. And I'm not stupid, I know Carol has always been the closest person to me other than Merle -until _her_\- and let's be honest in a different and better way. In a sisterly even motherly way. But there's never been another woman, hell even before the turn, a woman that I wanted -needed- and I don't know how this will go down with her because I always suspected she didn't have only brotherly feelings towards me. And my brain just couldn't give a fuck about any of it or them right now. I just want to be on my own, keep everyone safe of course but past that nothin else. I luck out for now and she stays put.

The group comes back in the early hours of the morning the next day, thankfully in one piece. They look tired and discouraged but safe. I don't need to ask to know Virginia was full of nothin good. After they rest for a couple hours we gather around in a semi circle inside the library and listen to the events that occurred.

There was a close call, too close given by the way Tyrese's entire demeanor has changed and the tick in jaw as Rick tells the story of Noah's walker brother in his house. More unsettling though is the legs and arms separated from the torsos and heads of walkers. Added in with something about "Wolves" and the brutality of Noah's mother's death, Virginia was just full of fucked up shit that reminds us that the living are worse than the dead.

Rick gives us all a few moments to digest all this before he speaks up asking the obvious. "What now?"

We all glance at each other, wondering who will speak up. Eugene that asshole fake scientist won't make any eye contact and Abraham is much more solemn and quiet recently. Sasha and Tyrese look too shaken up to say anything and a bomb could go off and Maggie wouldn't notice. Noah and Carol, our only injured members and really they're lucky to only be as hurt as they are, both stay quiet too. Rosita and Tara are always together now and I can tell they want to speak up but being the newest members, one who rolled up with the Governor and one who lead us on a wild cure goose chase, neither feel as though they have a right. And Father Gabriel well I'm surprised he hasn't run away from us, he's completely out of his comfort zone in this group. It's down to me, Michonne, Carl and Glenn. I sure as hell don't feel like sayin shit and I'm saved by the usually quiet Michonne.

"Regardless of what we've recently found out I think we should head to Washington. It was our nation's capital and Eugene chose it for a reason, if there's anywhere left it could be there. We can't give up, no matter how lost we feel. We're alive and we have to make the most of that." She finishes by looking at each of us in turn, gauging our reactions.

Glenn speaks up next, agreeing with her. "You're right, it's better than any other idea we could try to come up with right now. It's a new area and we have to keep on moving, surviving." He ends by looking over at Maggie, I feel how nervous and worried he is about her.

"Alright, well I agree as well but we are a group, a team. Does anyone disagree?" Rick asks the group.

No one says anything, cause there's no good to reason to not try. I would rather stay here and pray to a God I don't believe in for Beth to walk through that door but that's pointless.

I know I have to speak up before anyone other than Rick and Carol notice that something's up. "Okay then let's make a plan and head out in two days at sunrise."


	4. Chapter 4

**Okay guys here is where I have to ask for you to start to bear with me. They got the group to Virginia in one episode where as we haven't left the state in five seasons LOL so I'm working with the timeframe my own way because I had to make it fit my story. Why they left the church etc. Hopefully it's not too far-fetched but as I said bear with me! And I have a timeline in my head so if anyone's curious just PM me!**

Finally, this morning I was able to talk Dr. Edwards into letting me go tomorrow so only 5 days vs 7. Another positive to add to my short list. He admitted that the fact I woke up period was enough of a sign that I would be okay and these days there wasn't much more he could for me anyway. He keeps talking about luck or God being there for me that fateful day with Dawn, but I know it wasn't either. It was a tall, gentle man with a big white beard and a kind smile who wrapped his arms around me the only way he can now and saved me. He really will always be there, my daddy.

Going back to that first day I was up, after they stitched up Morgan's arm he came straight to my room. Honesty, I was a little surprised to see him. I guess my hope is waning right now because a small voice in the back of my mind told me he would get cleaned up and leave. And then I'd be on my own, no map, no ally and yeah that would not be my number one plan of action but I already told myself I would still make it work.

Since then, I've gotten to spend quite a bit of time with Morgan. Thinking back I realize again how little Rick ever spoke about the man. I can admit that he might have a few loose marbles rolling around but at the end of the day he's a survivor and a good ally. If we do find the group the fact he helped me should definitely be in his favor and I would stick up for him for sure. Plus, he's here and trying after losing his wife and son and that makes me like him immediately.

He told me about finding the church one evening and how he planned to stay and rest for the night but was forced out by a herd. When he ran for it he cut himself and ended up near the hospital where some now helpful officers offered to bring him here. Morgan admitted if it wasn't so deep or bleeding so profusely he would've told them to shove their help where the sun don't shine. But he knew he needed medical aid and for the first time in a while he trusted strangers.

The first issue we talked about was the fact that they didn't have the map with them. Of course that had crossed my mind but I got no negative feeling from this knowledge, I only felt that this was our first bread crumb and maybe our only solid one leading us to the group. Another officer had seen a glimpse of everyone once Daryl carried me outside and said there were around 11 people there and when I started describing everyone I figured out Michonne and Carl weren't there. However, again I felt no negativity or sadness. They must've been at the church or somewhere safe. That can only mean they've met new people. We were all separated for a good while so it's not a shock we have new members. I'm not sure why Rick and I'm guessing some others didn't head to Washington and instead decided to split up but it seems that they've all come together again now.

I totally realize I could be making up hope and theories outta thin air and my guesses may have nothing in common with their situation or plan. But if I don't try and make sense of this and make a plan out of the only clue I have then I might as well stay here till I die and like hell that's going to happen. So even if it is delusional I'm sticking to my plan, my theory and my hope.

After that first night Morgan and I not only make a plan but get to know each other. We might as well since we have no idea when we'll find the group. Not if but when. I can't allow any other thoughts in my mind, if I lose any positivity I'll give up.

He doesn't talk too much about his family but I can tell he lost them both to walkers. He's very honest again by telling me about making the decision to take his life or live it. And I share with him my attempt at suicide and how happy I am regardless of everything that I'm still here today. I can tell he appreciates my honesty and it's good for us both to speak to someone who's been to the edge and back. Even I went a bit farther...

When I bring up Virginia he's very quick to dismiss my small idea of going there in case they followed Noah. It's almost as if he knows it's a dead end. I try to ask some questions but he shuts down and changes the subject to Washington. I vow to find out more from him and how he knows it's not worth our time. But not now, I need to keep him here and ready to find my group.

In between making a plan to follow the map but venture into the woods as well since I know we do that to be safe we keep up the chit chat. Morgan is again open with me about Rick and how he may feel towards him. He's worried he'll want nothing to do with him and would understand after their last encounter, but he hopes he can forgive him for being "a loon" as he put it and give him a chance to join us. He told me he always hoped to hear Rick's voice on that walkie-talkie a very long time ago and knows they must be meant to work together somewhat after meeting twice during the apocalypse.

"I mean come on we've both survived this long that has to mean something right?" He asks me, looking worried.

"It definitely has a meaning, I'm not sure what but I'll do whatever I can to help. As long as you pull your weight and I know you will and the group can trust you then I don't see an issue. I mean come on if you help me after they think I'm dead they'll be beyond grateful." I try to reassure him and it's all the truth, I can't say for sure how the group will feel towards him but I can hope.

"Thank you Beth. You're helping to make me feel like it was a good idea to come back out into the world. There are good people left." He tells me with a small smile, the first real one I've seen so far.

I can't say anything, I barely nod and smile back as he leaves before our last night here. That sounded too close to another conversation I had with someone else and pulls at my heart.

Once I lie down for the night I let my mind drift to some new information from Officer Shepard and even after hearing it I still think of myself as a good person. Even if this tidbit made me feel better than it should have...okay maybe I won't be joining my daddy when my time comes. I wanted to know what happened to Dawn. I really doubted anyone here did the deed and I couldn't even picture Rick being the one. She confirmed both of my queries by telling me it was a rugged looking man with a crossbow over his shoulder that shot her (successfully) through the head before anyone could even contemplate reaching for a weapon. She also told me it took her by surprise that he was the one to pull the trigger as he seemed completely distraught. I don't ever want him to feel any pain or sadness, even if that is unrealistic. But he's suffered so much in his life and before any of this apocalypse crap even started. So yes, a part of me felt good to know he did that to Dawn for me. Even after death or what he thought was my demise he was there, defending me. By killing her in vengeance for me he will probably save more innocent lives because Shepard is in charge now and she has true hope for the future. Also, more importantly she won't keep people here against their will or watch others like Noah or Joan be mistreated anymore. I know he wasn't thinking of any of this at the time but when I tell him about how much better this place is -to me it'll always be a house of horrors but I can appreciate the help I've received- I know it'll strike a chord within him. He can say whatever he wants and put himself down as many times as he wants but we all see and know he's the best part of all of us. Selfless, brave, loyal and kind.

I only allow these thoughts into my mind at night where I can lose myself in him which in turn gives me the strength I'll need for the next day when Morgan and I set out to find him and the group. I remember moonshine and fights, I remember to never be afraid of him because when I stood up to him outside that shack he needed it. He needed someone to push him to let it out and admit he's a human being with feelings not just the kick ass archer zombie killer who keeps people alive. I remember being the only person to use his bow even if I sucked. I remember his need to be by my side so fast and check my stupid ankle and then the best serious piggyback ever. I remember peanut butter, jelly, singing and especially the way he looked at me that night. It was the way every girl deserves to have a man look at her. And then I cry myself to sleep because sleep doesn't come easy but I need my rest.

I wake with the sun and after a small meal we say our thank yous and goodbyes to the hospital residents. They even give us some supplies and a gun each, I feel like it's an attempted apology. I can forgive and appreciate the gesture even if I'll never forget. I say goodbye to Edwards last and he almost looks sad.

"Nothing I ever do will make up for my actions here. But I won't go back to who I was under Dawn, I'll only do good. I hope I can help the world get back to normal one day. Wow that sounded cheesy but it's true, I'll try my best to make up for my mistakes. And I'll think of you and hope for the best. I really do think you'll find your group." He tells me with a genuine smile.

"Thank you." It's all I can manage but I know he can feel my gratitude in my words no matter how short and in the small hug I give him.

After that we head out through the quiet lot that they keep clear regularly now. Their priorities have changed. Once at the gates we follow the lines on the map and start our hopefully successful journey.

"Here goes nothing!" I say a brightly as possible to a wary looking Morgan.

This shall be interesting.


	5. Chapter 5

We've been walking for a couple of days now and I'm starting to lose hope not just for myself but everyone. It hasn't rained in weeks and we can't find any water, not a goddamn drop. We're all weak and tired and running on empty but we have to push through it, we have to find some shelter. Then the majority of us can stay safe while the rest go out on a hunt for water, I'll be the lead. I need to bring every tracking skill I have out and use all my senses, if we ever want a chance in hell of surviving. We're not only physically drained but emotionally, we've all dropped down about 10 notches on the "we're still alive after the apocalypse, have hope" meter.

Rick and I begin to lead the group on the road for a while instead of the woods, its easier terrain than to navigate the dense trees all the time. Even though it's not as safe I can't imagine how many other people have survived along with us especially in this heat with no shelter or water, I know we're not alone in the trouble department. It's the first time he's really approached me alone and I can already tell it's going to be our first conversation that doesn't have anything to do with the group and where we're going and decisions. He approaches me how he always does like I'm a caged animal which I guess I am. After a few moments of companionable silence, once we're quite a bit ahead of the group he says something that goes straight to my gut and I can't lie my heart too.

"Daryl, I meant what I said before, you're my brother. Not only does that mean I care about you and have your back but I know you by now. I know this is eating away at you more than anything has before. And I know you lost something back there."

Before I even realize it, very quietly I mutter the word "_everything_".

I know Rick heard me because his steps falter for just a second.

"Well I'm here, I know you might not want to talk about it or even think about it, but I am here. Don't let it do to you what it did to me because no good came of that. I just know that the _everything_ you lost, would've been good and you would've been supported." After that he slows down his steps so he's walking in line with Carl who's holding Judith.

To most it would seem as though he didn't say much of anything. But I know that last sentence was telling me that if we had left the hospital with her alive and warm and breathing that no one would've judged us or given as hell for being, well, _us_. Okay fine, I can't speak for Maggie. She is the protective older sister but honestly I would've been disappointed to get anything less than a black eye from her after she found out that I was in love with her baby sister.

This time its me faltering in my steps then becoming frozen in the middle of the road for a few seconds before I can get my heart rate back to normal and keep walking. In love? I've never been in love I've never even simply _loved_ anything or anyone before. Ever. But the minute I had those feelings towards Beth I knew what they were because of the fact I had never had them and they were uncharted territory and scared the living daylights out of me. We may not have interacted much at the prison but I always knew she was a spitfire. I always saw her, noticed her and respected her. She spoke up for what she thought was right and she overcame her suicide attempt with a vengeance. She might not have felt like being Judith's fulltime babysitter was a lot or that important but it was. To Rick, Carl and Lori it was everything. Otherwise, she wouldn't of had a mama or any parent because let's be honest, it took a long time for her dad to become a daddy. For keeping that baby safe, alive, happy and healthy we should all be on our knees thanking her because it was no easy task. And Judith is the only other flicker of hope in this god forsaken world, we're lucky to have her. I know it ate at Beth not knowing Judith's fate after the prison. Especially after she risked her life to go back in there to try and find all those children but we all know she was looking for Judy most.

And I never once felt that she was a burden or that she couldn't handle herself when we got out together. The second I saw her standing there outside the prison I was thanking anyone who would listen inside of my head that I had stayed around to kill that fucker in the tank. Because if I hadn't, if I had decided instead that I got enough revenge and ran for my life, I would've missed her. _**No!**_ I can't even let that thought go through my mind. Those I guess, months, weeks? On the road with her were the best of my life. Before _and_ after the turn. We became a team, we could talk without words. She had my back and I trusted her completely. I trusted her not only in the sense of having my back and that we can set up camp, kill walkers and make a meal together but I trusted her with me. My stories, my memories and my life. I opened up to her more than anyone else that's left in this world or already dead. And I know I'll never even be in the same realm that she's in when it comes to words but I sure as hell would love to try because there's so much more I want to tell her. Not just about how I feel and what I want for us or wanted but again about my life. There would not be many happy stories but they're the only ones I've got and she's the only person that I've ever wanted to share them with. I guess thinking about it like this, makes the whole in the love thing not such a shock. Before the turn and after why hold back those feelings like that? I've never experienced it but the short time that I did when it was positive it was the best thing I've ever felt. It even drowned out the horrible memories that haunt me almost all the time, the ones that keep me from getting more than four hours of sleep a night.

I don't know how long I've been walking ahead half lost in my thoughts before Rick says we should stop for a break. Perfect, this is my chance to get away.

I quickly speak up. "I'm gon go look for water and try to hunt while you guys rest." Before I can even turn around for the cover of the trees Carol is next to me saying she's coming along. Fuuck, why?! I was never going to leave forever, I just wanted 20 minutes to myself. Damnit! I mutter "fine" before setting off at a brisk pace in my direction of choice.

Carol keeps up and after walking for a short while I stop, giving her the chance to get out whatever the fuck she's been waiting to say.

"She saved me." She speaks so quietly I'm the only person we know that would've heard her. I don't know what to say, as usual, but I can feel she ain't finished anyway. "She saved you too." It's not a question, just an observation. Again, I stay quiet, of course she did. Not only saved but brought me back to life. There is nothing to say because it don't matter anymore, she's she's….I can't think the word.

Carol never needed much from me so I'm not surprised when she continues. "And that's okay, it's more than okay its good, even if she is…gone. Let yourself feel Daryl. Let it all out, any pain, sadness anything…else too. This has hit us all hard, harder than we need or can handle. But we have to keep moving and living. Keep the hope that lived within her alive. I can shut down, not feel but not you. You're here and you're alive, _live_." She finishes by squeezing my hand and starts walking back to the group.

I can tell part of that conversation was hard for her, most likely thinking about my feelings towards Beth, but, she still spoke to about it. And I needed to hear it. She's right, I need to let this out before it kills me from the inside out. Not now though, I've been gone long enough for now.

After a close call with some wild dogs and then a hearty meal, we take shifts under the cover of trees letting us all get some rest for the night before we set off again. The next day is proving to be as shitty as the previous. After a tough fight with a group of walkers, they never would've been an issue if we were fed and hydrated, I decide to take off again. This time I know I'll be alone.

I walk for over half an hour this time, deep into the woods, subconsciously tracking, but I have no idea what. And then there it is, in a field, a barn all by itself. It's nothing special but depending how the rest of the day goes we can come here, it has a roof, no damage and no walkers around, well for now at least. Once I take in the barn and remember its location I slump to the ground, my back against a tree.

I decide I deserve one of my precious cigarettes, if I ever needed one now is that time. I'm almost finished the addictive little thing when I put the burning end against my skin. I feel nothing, it don't even hurt. What the fuck is wrong with me? But I know the answer before I even finish asking myself the question. Beth. _Beth Beth Beth Beth Beth Beth Beth Beth Beth__. _Her loss is killing me but holding all this in for all these days is simply speeding up the process. Fine then, I won't hold it in anymore. I open the dam and it won't stop. Tears, hushed words for her even if she can't hear them. "Sorry, so sorry. Let you down. Come Back. Need you. _Please_." All the while my head is full of images of her. That smile, bright and heart breaking in its beauty. Those golden blonde waves, like a halo which is fitting for her. A halo with a damn braid, that braid, how I want to tug on it while I kiss those plump pink lips of hers. And last I see her, tipsy and happy telling me how I'll miss her so bad. And damnit girl I do, you were right so right, I miss you more than I can handle. I miss you and I miss having something with you that I've never had before and I might've fucked up but I woulda tried my hardest to make you happy.

I let myself cry like a baby for a while longer and head back. I'm able to catch 3 squirrels on my return trek, they're not water but they're better than nothing. We make a small fire and roast up our tiny meal. Even though night has fallen, there is no talk of moving on. What's the point in our state? Some of the group start to lie down, try to rest. As we are there, digesting our meal we feel it. Drop after drop. Huge splashes of rain, on us, the road, the trees, everywhere. They all start laughing, grabbing bottles, bags anything we can catch water in and then they're jumping, dancing and drinking the water from the sky. I get their excitement I do and I can feel the water on my heated skin but I just stand there, unmoving. A few moments pass by and I look up at the sky, it's ominous. I can feel it in the air too, the heavy humidity and the winds picking up, there's a storm coming. It won't hit us tonight, but definitely sometime tomorrow. Thank god for that damn barn.

"Rick! Quick, get everyone together we gotta go, there's a helluva storm coming. I found somewhere before that we can stay in, prepare as best we can." I yell over to him and he nods back telling everyone to grab their stuff and follow me.

When we make it to the barn we set off, everyone doing something to help. Maggie clears out the one walker inside, I check the perimeter and get some wooden planks for the door, windows won't be an issue as they're up high on the second story of the barn. Between the rest of the group they set everyone up in the middle of the barn surrounded by hay on all but two sides and also hang up bags and bottles to catch water. Someone even found a broken pipe that we stuck out the window on one end and into a barrel on the other so we will have a good amount of rain go in there. The remainder of that night up until just after sunset the next day is boring and monotonous. It's hard for me being inside all this time but after we put those planks up there was no good reason to leave, not till this storm passed. Throughout the day after we settled in the barn, two of us hung around the door all the time to keep an eye on things but after several hours of nothing outside but wind and rain we decide to check on it periodically instead. That night as the sun was setting Rick starts telling this story about his grandpa. When he's done he says something that shocks me, "We are the walking dead." I try to stay calm but I need space, checking on the door is a good excuse to pace, right? Before I walk away from them I can't hold in how I really feel. "We ain't them."

I feel like the caged animal Rick was talking to earlier, pacing like crazy in front of that damned door. I'm about ready to rip off those planks and go smoke in a storm. And then I hear it, the banging. I look through the small gap in the door and see them, the herd outside trying to get in. There's dozens upon dozens of em. Maggie catches my eye first and one by one everyone rushes over and pushes back against the dead. We're slipping in the mud, the walkers smell us now and are getting fierce.

I don't know how long we can hold them back.

**I'm on a roll (please don't jinx myself lol) so here's another chapter! Things will speed up and heat up ;-) soon. Thanks for the love, keep it coming! :) **


	6. Chapter 6

**The end of this chapter is for DarylDixon'sLover and the next one even more so! xo**

Morgan and I must look like an odd team, but that part aside our first day and night haven't been bad at all. So far we have stuck to our plan, follow the map and switch from the road to the woods every so often. We've encountered a few walkers here and there and in some areas more frequently than others. This actually makes me feel better and no it's not the bullet wound talking. Maybe there are more in certain areas because we're the second set of walking lunch to come through here, maybe we are on the same path as the group. Even if we haven't found one clue to lead us to believe that. I'm trying my best to remember everything Daryl taught me about tracking but so far there's either nothing to find or I suck at it.

I'm trying my damnedest to stay positive but by the second morning it's becoming a lot easier said than done. So, I allow myself to think of firm biceps, tanned skin and deep stares over candle light, even if it hurts it keeps me going. HE keeps me going. Of course these thoughts swerve in a different direction after a while, been doing that a lot recently. Am I a bad person and sister for barely even thinking of seeing Maggie yet? She's my blood, I know she's alive cause if she wasn't I would've felt a part me go away with her. My sister, my only living relative is alive but, she was nowhere to be seen at the hospital. Or Glenn for that matter. I know if both were alive and in the area with the group, one if not both would've been inside that hospital. But neither were….Fine maybe I'm jumping to conclusions but there's a nagging inside me that says Maggie was nowhere near me or that hospital. I'm starting to think she never was looking for me in the first place. I will confront her and talk to her about it, make her admit the truth and work through it from there. I know there must some sort of a reason if this is the case and I love her so much even if she wasn't my only kin left I would work through this issue with her. Another part of me, a selfish part of me I've never indulged in before is kind of okay with that scenario. It will give me a perfectly understandable excuse to spend time with Daryl at first. I know, I know stupid and immature but I will miss it being just the two of us. Don't get me wrong I can't wait to see everyone that survived, but Daryl and I against the world well that was more than okay with me.

My thoughts are interrupted by a small piece of cloth or something in the road. I have to inspect anything we find, check all our surroundings. I bend down to pick it up and my breath catches in my throat. It's a sock. A once white frilly sock that is now greyish and has a tiny hole in it. What stands out is the fact I can fit about three fingers inside of it because it's a baby sock.

There is a slim chance that my Judy isn't the only baby out there but another baby, in the same area going the same way the group is going? I doubt it and I also never thought she was….gone. I still feel immensely guilty about losing her and will never forgive myself. But, I felt like her second momma. Lori will always be her momma no matter what but I tried my best raising her and loved her as my own. And just like with Maggie if she was gone a part of me would it feel, dying with her. This is just a tangible piece of hope that they're out there, heading this way. During my few seconds of reflection, Morgan has stopped and is watching me inspect the sock, clutch it to me and then smile widely while tears roll down my face. Poor man. I gather my bearings and explain it to him.

"Morgan, I don't know if Rick told you but his wife had another baby, while we were at the prison. She died giving birth but the baby, she survived and she was doing just fine. I took care of her but lost her when we were attacked and I know this sock ain't got her initials on it or nothing but I know it's hers. We have to be on the right track." I finish, finally feeling slight hope and happiness again.

He looks at me, a tad skeptical but responds. "Well, I don't imagine there's many babies out there these days so I have to think you're right."

I give him a warm smile, tucking the sock away safely and then start thoroughly inspecting our surroundings. The road, the tree line and even inside the woods a little ways behind and ahead of us. Just before where we found the sock is a well concealed patch where a fire once was lit. The group put it out properly and tried to disguise it. If it weren't for the beginnings of my training I never would've seen it. I tell Morgan about the fire and bones of a small animal a few yards away.

"They must've set up camp, cooked something and made their way along the road. I think we should follow the road for a while and then start switching back and forth more frequently between the woods." I hope I don't come across as bossy, I just want to make a good decision and he don't say much in regards to the decision making process.

"Okay little miss, sounds good to me. This is good lead, I can feel it." He looks at me seriously, no joking or malice in his voice, I felt a lot more comfortable calling the shots now I know he doesn't take offense.

I'm not trying to tiptoe around his feelings or put a friendship with him first or anything. It's just that, I was spoiled being with Daryl and I don't want to be biased or closed off to others because I truly only want one man. Daryl and I were more than partners, more than halves to a whole team. He was _my other_ _half_, no matter how corny it sounds I could feel him clicking into place with me. Filling gaps and voids I didn't know existed. What it was is that I had fallen in love for the first time. I cared for Jimmy and Zach, loved Jimmy even but it was more infatuation. It was kid love that even under normal circumstances wouldn't have lasted. Throw in the whole we are living through a zombie apocalypse together and yeah kind of changes the stakes. They were amazing boys who grew into brave men and I was hurt beyond belief when they both were taken away too soon but they were not "the one" for me and I know in this world we could all go at any moment. When I was with Daryl it was different from the start. And I mean besides the brooding, grumpy silent, snake eating treatment. I found myself being more open with him than with anyone else besides my journal (wow, sexy Beth) and I never felt nervous or awkward, I knew he'd never judge me. He might not say much back but he listened and cared. When these feeling first started to be so prominent in my mind and heart I was a bit taken aback by them. I knew I felt things for Daryl I hadn't felt before, physical and emotional urges that were new and exciting but wasn't this sudden? And I then I told myself, no, it's not. Yeah I won't be ripping off his clothes –even though that thought crosses my mind _a lot_\- as soon as I see him or make him marry me tomorrow BUT I will not hold back. I will not let him shut down or talk himself out of this. We almost lost each other and I do not want that, probably can't handle that ever happening again, however if it does he will know I care. He will know to be honest with me and that he can safely express anything and everything to me. Cause life is too damn short to court each other holding hands and beat around any damn bushes. I'm in love and falling harder every day and why the hell should I keep that to myself? I know it'll be a lot for him but it's a lot for me too, we can do this together, everything is easier and better together.

Back to Morgan, we won't mesh like Daryl and I, we won't communicate or get along the same way and I do not want that knowledge to ruin this. He could've murdered me twenty times over by now and he hasn't. He could've run, stolen my supplies or turned out to be like Gorman. But he didn't and he's not. He's a good man and I want to make this agreement work so I must be kind and cautious.

We keep walking until dusk, until we both feel the change in the air. Rain. If you live in the south you know when bad weather is coming and we both give each other a look that says "Oh shit."

We have to venture off the road and find shelter, fast. We've been wandering for over an hour now and I'm getting seriously worried, there's nothing but fields and trees. The weather is picking up, there won't be too much more than rain tonight but still we need cover. And then, I'm so thankful for Morgan. I have been all along but right now it's tenfold. I get the sense he was looking into doomsday prepping close to the time of the turn so he's the one to see the small patch with no grass and a small yet sturdy handle attached to the wooden door. It would've been a storm cellar way back when, and there's no house nearby and these cellars aren't too common around here but we need to look inside. It was definitely a storm cellar but it had been updated. There wasn't anything in it really, couple canned goods on a small set of shelves and small bottles of water but there are a couple solar lights and until tonight sun is all we've been having so there's a dim glow inside. They must've been preppers or organized regular folk who cleared this out ages ago. It smells musty and has dust everywhere, thank goodness. An empty storm cellar with light and a door that closes? Maybe luck does exist.

We spent that night, the whole next day AND night in that cellar. We couldn't even wait for sunrise the following day to emerge from our bunker. The sun was barely tickling the horizon as we made our way back to the road we were on. I'm so thankful to God, daddy, luck and whatever else for the fact we were safe from the howling brutal winds and torrential rain outside, but locked in a hole in the ground with a stranger? Let's just say we both caught up on a whole bunch of lost sleep.

We find the road easily and continue on our path. It must be close to noon when I see something on the side of road. An old plastic bag, full of water. Them, it has to be…I start checking the woods for another fire or animals remains but what I find is even better, _tracks_. They're smudged and not as clear thanks to the storm but they're there and they lead into the woods.

"Morgan, come here." I say quickly, my heart racing. I point at the gloppy looking boot tracks trailing into the woods. "It must be them, we can follow but veer off when they start to end, just in case." I do not need any more reminders that the living are worse than the dead, we will circle around where they went to be safe. I can't let hope and thoughts of Daryl get us killed now.

Morgan looks apprehensive, but that makes sense. Either way it's people. New ones who could be like Dawn or Gorman. Or it could be my group, who may not accept the man Rick met so long ago. After pausing for a moment he seems to collect himself, straighten his shoulders and then say, "better to be safe than sorry. Let's keep tracking."

We follow the almost ruined tracks forever. Well it feels like it at least but in reality I know it hasn't even been an hour yet. Once the tree line comes into view we go to the left to circle back to where the tracks will lead. There is a huge field that took a horrible beating from the storm. So many trees are down or broken in half. Mother Nature you bitch.

A second later I'm fixated. Not on the trees, not on the dozens of dead or mangled walkers trapped beneath them or even the huge barn not too far away that has been untouched by the wrath of nature. No, my eyes are stuck on the back of a person crouched down in the midst of this madness, they look deep in thought.

Suddenly, my heart stops beating for a split second before starting back up in double time, I can feel and hear the blood rushing through my veins. Then I hear the strangest sound and realize it's me.

The sound bubbled out of me without my knowledge because I'm staring at angel wings on the back of a worn leather vest.

**Ahh my first sorta cliffy?! Don't worry I'll post tomorrow. xo**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you to everyone that has read my story, favorited it and followed it. An extra huge thank you to DarylDixon'sLover, brady66 and my Guest reviewer for the awesome reviews, they give me confidence to keep on going! Tell me what you think and if you hope to see anything happen. Xoxo **

After all the recent shit we've been through standing against that door as one definitely helped bring us back to the team we've always been. I don't know how the fuck we held out, there were countless reanimated corpses trying to break, gnaw and force their way into the barn. What I do remember is at one point during the night the storm picked up. It changed so fast and became so much stronger that I was about to tell everyone to move away from the door before it was ripped off and we went flying with the damn thing. The rattling of the door became so fierce we were all shaking trying to push our weight against it. But that was it, only rattling, no pushing back and no other sounds except that of trees snapping and crashing. No moans or groans and the smell of death wasn't as suffocating as had it been. I'm sure I weren't the only one to notice all this but none of us looked anywhere but at that door, we kept pushing not making a sound until some of us literally stared to collapse. By that point even the storm was slowing down to small gusts, so the majority of the group went to rest while a small few left our bodies where there were, almost frozen in place.

Of course I was the last one guarding the door, even if now I was only resting my back against. It's an hour or so before dawn when I see some of the group start to wake up and wonder when Rick will come over and make me take a real break. But it's not Rick, it's Maggie who gets up and slowly makes her way over to me. What's even more surprising is that she sits down next to me before she starts to talk.

"It's been quiet for hours and we can't see nothing but trees out there, go lie down, you need some sleep." She finishes with a sad smile. Even though she's sitting closer to me than I'm used to its not uncomfortable. It must be the fact she's cut from the same cloth as Beth, I know she's good like her and she's the last piece of anything that links me to the sweet blonde who's face is tattooed on the inside of my eyelids. Before I grab my bag, bow and force my muscles to stop twitching and my brain to shut up for a few hours I hand her back the music box Carl gave her. I saw her staring at it when we first got settled in the barn and she kept turning the handle on the bottom with no luck. I took it when she wasn't looking hoping I could fix it.

"Here," I hand her the box. "I looked at it and there was some dirt stuck inside, wouldn't let some of the parts turn but it should work now." I don't think I'm ever said that much to her at one time before.

She looks a little shocked as she gently takes the box from my hands and looks at it, runs her hands over every edge. "I know it's just an empty kids jewelry box but it reminds me of her. The bright colors, the fact she had one once and the music." Her voices starts to break at the end of her admission.

"She was tough. Real tough. Tougher than she thought or would admit to herself. She carried her own weight and survived out there. She deserved more than credit than she got." I don't know why I say any of it, other than the fact that it's true.

"She was, I do know that. But she was my baby sister, I guess it was easier for me to have her inside, safe. I shouldn't have tried so hard to protect her, she needed to learn on her own. And I know you say you didn't save her, and now I can tell it was mutual, but you trained her and taught her some more skills. I have to thank you for that." She looks at me, her face full of appreciation and I know she's dead serious. I hate thanks, ain't ever got em before the end of the world and sure as hell don't need em now but I know it's not about me. It's about Maggie, others and their need to express gratitude. So I just look at her for a moment, give her a half smirk, a small nod and then go lie down to try and sleep.

I actually sleep pretty deep for at least two hours which is good for me but I have to force myself to rest a bit more or I'll be no help to anyone. When I do finally get up I can see that Maggie and Glenn are still on watch and that the door hasn't been touched. I go over to Rick and tell him I want to go outside first, on my own to see whats going on. Yes, partly because I need this time and space to my goddamn self but also I don't know how we are still standing and we haven't heard one walker in hours. On a smaller note I'm hoping that maybe a tree or some other flying piece of debris killed a deer or something that I can bring back for everyone I know we're running low on well everything. Rick simply nods, he knows me and he knows I won't run and I can handle myself. Him, Glenn and I get the planks off the door and Rick tells everyone to stay put and I'll be back, letting them know what's going on.

Once I'm outside and the door shuts behind me I want to breathe a sigh relief, it was fucking difficult to be trapped inside like that when I'm so used to being outside in the open. But any breath that I had left in my body gets choked in my throat as I take in the scene around me. So many trees, huge trees, little trees, branches everything you could think of is snapped off, broken in half or has gone flying across the field trapping the dozens of walkers underneath it. Some are dead, heads smashed in and the rest are just bits and pieces. Moving fingers, chomping mouths, with blood and guts everywhere. I have to turn around a few times to look at the barn and the scene around me. There is no way in hell it should still be standing let alone without so so much as a tree through a window or part of it collapsing in. It's almost as if I'm looking at two separate pictures, a before and an after. They should not be related in any way.

I have to take a few steps away because it's freaking me the hell out. I'm about ready for someone from that old stupid candid camera show to jump out and yell gotcha! Tell us that the past few years have been a complete joke on us and we've all I a million bucks or something that is the only thing that makes sense to me. Unless, there's a pair of Greene family members up above us, guarding us and keeping us alive. But I can't think about that right now I can't think about her smiling face and her strong arms and her brave soul protecting all of us in the only way she knows how because if it wasn't for her and her dad I know for fact we would all be dead right now.

I'm starting to think it might be time to use up another precious cigarette but I'm running so low on them so I decide to do afull perimeter check instead to try and get my mind off of everything for a few minutes. Going around the field I end up back just before the worst patch of downed trees and half dead walkers. I drop my crossbow on the ground and I have to kneel down to brace myself and try to catch my breath. I'm so happy to be alive and fuck I don't know why. All I've wanted the past few days is to leave this earth,finally and all the pain I've ever been through. Right now all I can think about is that every single person I know and love is inside of that barn in one piece and I'm out here completely unscathed and we can move on from this.

Even though my crossbow isn't in my hand and I might be lost in thought I can never turn off my senses. My ears are always at attention, ready to hear the slightest sound and honestly it must be something inside of me that can just feel when things are going to happen or something is about to come our way. It's that part of me that felt someone approaching before I heard the slight snap of a twig. After that in one smooth motion I grab my crossbow, spin around I'm standing up pointing at the threat of either a human, walker or animal in a split second. I first and only very briefly I see an older man standing in front of me, he looks rough and has a weapon pointed at my face, he knows what he's doing. And then completely against my character and anything I've ever done in my entire worthless life I take my eyes off of him, off my immediate threat, and make him my least priority right now. The reason I do this, the reason I go against everything I've ever learned and practiced in my entire life, is because over one of his shoulders, half hidden, I see it. I see unruly blonde hair, I see a shoulder covered in a grey sweater and a little bit of yellow poking out, dirty yellow with splotches of blood and then I see one huge doe like bright blue eye.

And then all makes sense. The barn is not there, the barn was ripped apart or ripped out of the ground like in that stupid Oz movie. And I don't know what the fuck I ever did to end up in heaven but this has to be it. I know it has to be heaven because there's nowhere else Beth could go, she was too good and pure to end up anywhere else. In the mere seconds that this insane thought crosses my mind she gently touches the man's arm and starts to move around him. It's then I see it, I see the scars on her face and I see a small bandage is on the side and back of her head. I don't think that we end up like that in heaven. The few thoughts I've ever had about it I think that when you go there it all gets better. You heal, you're clean and happy. Another thing that's making me think this moment is real, giving me an ounce of hope, is the way that my heart is racing so hard its literally hurting my damn chest.

What seals the deal for me is that she steps around this strange man, her eyes on me and she starts to run towards me. And that's it. I'm never going to waste another fucking second of my life with a gentle arm around her waist or small squeeze of her shoulder. I drop my crossbow like it means nothing to me and I start taking huge determined strides towards her.

We meet in the middle and she throws herself into my arms with such force that I almost get knocked over. I'm surprised I didn't fall, I feel like you could brush a feather against me and I would go flying down. I enjoy the feel of her arms around my neck so tight that I can barely breathe and the fucking amazing feeling of her legs around my waist. I have one arm cradling the back of her head as gentle as ever and the other was squeezing her waist in a vice like grip, my other hand on her lower back, protectively. I can only stand and hold her for a very short time before I fall to the ground on my knees. Never once letting her get jostled, while my knees got so weak they literally collapsed beneath me. Then I feel her warm tears rushing down the side of my neck as my own face is buried in her shoulder and to my surprise moisture is coming out of my eyes too. We stay that way for god knows how long. It was too long to be safe and too short all at the same time. All we do is hold onto each other for dear life, breathing heavy and silently crying in each other's arms.

I risk a glance at the stranger she arrived with and I don't care who he is or why he's here but he's alright with me because he's standing a few feet away from us, scanning our immediate surroundings with his weapon ready. For some reason this person I've never set eyes on is giving us our moment and protecting us. Of course I want and need to know the entire story and why my beautiful Beth is with this man. But I can honestly say I could never deny this person if they even had a slight thought of joining us.

After a couple of minutes of pure happiness I pullback just enough to put both of my hands on either side of her face and put our foreheads together before I speak.

"I thought we all had died and that I was in heaven when I saw you." I murmur for her ears only.

She lets out a small and genuine laugh while wiping away a few of my tears before she speaks.

"Well if heavens real and any of us have any hope of ever going there I hope I can get some clean clothes and lose the scars." How is it that she practically read my mind, that we're so damn different, yet sometimes we think exactly the same. It makes my heart skip a beat.

I think she's going to go on and start talking and telling me all the things that have happened like she always does but she doesn't. Instead she leaves the fingers that were wiping away my tears on my cheek and then raises them to softly brush the hair out of my face. It must be the adrenaline, the heat of the moment or I don't fucking know but whatever it is I love it because she gently presses her lips against mine. It's as light as a feather and the most chaste touch from a woman I've ever received. But it sets my damn body on fire. And I want more. Whatever gave her the courage to do that gives me the courage to put one of my hands deep into her hair and pull her mouth to mine again. I give her the same gentle kiss she just gave me but instead of pulling away, I give her another and another. They're slow and gentle and then they slow down even more until both of our mouths are opening and deepening the kiss. Even though my body is still aflame and I've never wanted anyone more in my entire life I'm okay with just this. But then it becomes even better when her small soft tongue enters my mouth looking for my own. We stay this way for another minute or so, our tongues doing a slow, sensual dance together before I have to pull away. This is all too much and I have not forgotten the fact that we are in an open field and some strange man is 5 feet away.

"I could sit here forever and never let you go and kiss you until we're old and gray but this ain't the time or place. There's a barn full of people, especially a sister of yours that will have heart attacks to know that you're here. And also our bodyguard over there well, we all need know the background story on him." I tell her, rubbing my thumb across her plump bottom lip.

I can see and feel the disappointment as I say this to her, mostly because it reflects my own but she's also a smart girl who knows we'll have time for this later. I can sense that neither of us will ever waste another moment in each other's presence.

She lets out a small sigh and glances over her shoulder at her travel companion before she quietly says, "you're right."

After that I help her to stand up and grab my bow while never letting go of her hand. I will never let her go ever again. She then walks me over to the man she showed up with and says, "Daryl I want you to meet Morgan. Morgan this is Daryl."

Holy shit. This is the man that saved Rick's life when he first got out of that hospital. He's also the psycho motherfucker that tried to kill him, Michonne and Carl. And now he's standing here with my Beth, keeping us safe from walkers and anything else that could've come around as we made out like teenagers in a field of destruction.

Again, I need to know everything, why he's here, what's happened and anything else in between but for now I simply extend my hand and say "thank you."

He pauses for a moment and looks a little bit shocked before reaching his own hand out and giving me a firm shake.

"Well, I'm not sure what you're thanking me for but if it's for right now don't worry about it. This little lady right here has helped me quite a bit over the past few days and talked about you even more. I owe her a lot and I know how it is to feel that way about someone. I may be standing here but I know when you love someone that much and when you lose them that you lose a part of yourself as well. I'm glad you guys got reunited."

I simply not at his admission and tell them both, "well let's head over there, everyone's inside."

This time it's my turn to be shocked, because not only Morgan but Beth looks nervous as well. There's so many reasons why she could be feeling that way. It's going to be intimidating, overwhelming and also she doesn't know who's in there. But it's us, her family. As for Morgan, I get it, he's an outsider coming to a good-sized group of people that are more like family and I'd be scared shitless too.

We start a slow walk towards the barn and I tell Beth everyone who is inside, everyone that has survived and also about our newest members. That seems to ease her a bit knowing what she's walking into. And then I speak to both of them, "I'll go in first and bring Rick out so we can talk to him and explain and prepare everyone. But Beth, you need to be ready for Maggie. She's been distraught over the past few days. Glenn's been worried sick about her, hell we all have. She went to a bad place."

And there she is, my strong brave girl fighting every other emotion and bringing her strength to the surface. As soon as Beth heard that someone else, someone she loves needed something, she forgot all about her worries and her nerves and put that first. She squeezes my hand a bit tighter and I squeeze it right back, giving her any reassurance I can.

When we reach the barn I leave them both around the side and tell him I'll be right back and go grab Rick. Luckily, almost everyone besides Sasha and Tyrese who have now taken over watch, are still lying down, taking it easy. Last night would've drained anyone let alone our group, who hasn't had sustenance properly in too long. I see Rick sitting with his kids and nod with my head asking him to come outside with me.

Once we're outside and the door has been shut, he looks at me concerned and asks, "everything all right, what did you find?"

"I didn't find much and I don't know about everything being fine but we are. But we have to talk about that later, I found something, I mean I found someone well they found me."

Shit! I know I'm not good with words but I don't usually trip over myself like this. I'm blunt and to the point but I can damn well get it out. I can't really blame myself though, who would've thought I would ever have that bright spark come back and my life ablaze again? I take a deep breath and shake my head to clear my thoughts.

"Look, I went for a walk around the field and the barn because I couldn't figure out how the hell we survived last night. While I was out there, I was approached by two people."

I see right away that Rick is on the defense, the alarms have been raised and he's ready to fight.

"Wait wait. Let me finish before you do anything. It was Beth."

Now, instead of defensive Rick looks confused and worried. He must think that I've completely lost my mind so I continue before he writes me off as delusional.

"And she wasn't alone, she was with Morgan. The guy that found you in the beginning."

Now I'm the one that's worried, I think Rick might pass out. But before he can get anymore worried or even open his mouth they both make their way around the side of the barn.

Even though my back is to them I know they're there, not only because I sense them but Rick's eyes fill with tears and he has to lift his jaw off the ground. I know he cared about Beth, not in the way I do but she helped to raise his child. A baby that he couldn't be there for in the beginning. She will always have a special place in his heart and I know that he's probably the third happiest person here right now. She steps up to him, cutely, (and I would only ever use that fucking word on her) and quietly she says "hi." Rick's face splits in half in the biggest grin I've seen in a long time and they share a tight embrace. Unfortunately, the joyous reunion has to be cut short because we need to get to the bottom of everything with Morgan. I do think that him and Rick need to have this out alone first and then talk to the group. I think this is best because right now this shouldn't be up to any of us especially me and Maggie because I'm pretty sure we'd both be on his side without knowing anything that's happened.

Once he releases Beth he sets his sights on Morgan. His face hardens but not in a cruel way just the cautious and determined way that's necessary these days. I can see him warring with himself, and I don't blame him. I wouldn't know where the hell to start off in this situation either. And as if sensing this Beth speaks up and makes us all set our attention on her.

"Guys, I know this is crazy and looks weird and there's a lot to talk about, many questions that everyone will want answered, but, for right now just know that I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for Morgan. It wasn't just me taking a chance on him he took a chance on me too. I know it's not as easy as that and we need to talk everything over as a team but for now please keep that in mind." She pleads with us, looking at us both first and then to Morgan who I can tell is grateful to have her speak up at all for him.

Rick and Morgan exchange the same short yet strong gesture that him and I had a few moments ago and Rick simply says "Alright. Let me go in there and warn them, not that this is bad but we've all had a really rough time of it thinking that we had lost you Beth and this will be a shock."

Beth simply nods in understanding, of course she understands she's too goddamn good for this world. And for me but I'm not gonna think those thoughts right now because if she wants me even if it is the end of the world I will take her happily.

I wait outside with them while Rick goes inside. We can hear him clearly from here.

"Guys, everybody come here, I need to talk to you about something. First of all, everything is fine, no one's hurt so you don't need to worry but something has happened. Daryl went out a little while ago to check out our surroundings and see what damage the storm did. He found more than he was bargaining for. He found some survivors, survivors we know. And I want all of you to stay where you are, don't move a muscle when they come in here. Everyone except Maggie." A few seconds later one of the barn doors opens slightly and I lead the way inside, with Beth gripping my hand harder than I thought possible.

The next thing I know she's ripped out of my grasp.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello there lovelies! Thanks once again for all the love, I never thought anyone would even read one chapter let alone give me the support I've had so far. You all rock my socks! This isn't the most exciting chapter but one I find necessary. Hope you enjoy xoxo**

I don't think one human being alone could rip the door off a barn but Maggie came close. Rick had barely finished what he was saying before she had pulled me from Daryl and was hugging me so hard I was seeing stars.

"Maggs. Can't. Breathe. I'm here. I'm okay. Loosen up." I squeak out before I actually faint from loss of oxygen.

Maggie finally eases up her grip on me to hold me at arms length, tears silently pouring down her face as she looks me over. I don't know if she's checking for injuries, other than the obvious, or if she doesn't believe I'm here. Either way it doesn't matter, right now any issues we may need to work through don't matter either, only the fact my beautiful sister is right in front of me. I reach out and put my my hand against her cheek as the tears start to roll down my face as well. "I missed you Maggie."

We're interrupted by Rick as he says, "everyone this is Morgan, you all know about him. Him and I are going to go and talk things over. Alone. We'll be back soon." He allows no room for an argument and they leave the barn quickly.

After that they are like a swarm of bees all around me, hugs, kisses, touches, tears and of course questions. There is so much love in this moment I feel like I'm suffocating in the best way possible, in love and happiness. Daryl never lets his eyes stray from me but never interrupts, giving me my reunion with my family. We all move over to their little camp area inside of the barn. First, I'm introduced to our newest members, Tara, Rosita, Abraham, Eugene and Gabriel a pastor. They all seem very nice so far, definitely a tad damaged but I look forward to getting to know them all, even if I may keep the one-on-one time with Eugene to a minimum. I can already feel his eyes on me a bit too intently. And I know I'm not making it up it when two seconds later Daryl is there standing behind me. Of course they all want to know what the hell happened and how I'm possibly sitting here right now. So, with Judith in my lap, which I have to say is the second best part of today, knowing she's alive, I start my story from the beginning. I tell them everything, from waking up the first time and learning how corrupt the hospital was, but never with too many details. To my second time waking up there and finding out about Dawn, seeing Morgan and how different the hospital is now. Every single person, especially poor Noah who I had to give a bear hug to, apologizes for leaving me behind. And Daryl puts his hand on my shoulder and squeezes tightly. I tilt my head to the side and give him a gentle smile before I address the whole group. "None of you have anything to be sorry for. I had been shot and I was very close to death, you did what you could and I found my way back to you. Please don't feel bad. I'm just so happy to be here with you guys."

After that I sit with mainly members of our original group and I listen to everything they have been through. About what happened to each little group right after the prison, to finding each other, to Terminus and the horrors that were living in there and lastly the loss of Bob. I can sense they're leaving out details too. By the end of it I'm almost back in tears, unfortunately we all know there's no way that Bob was about to walk through the doors. I can feel his loss all around us and when I look over at Sasha and Tyrese, lost in their own world, I notice she looks haunted. But how couldn't she be? If I lost Daryl...well I can't imagine life after that. About an hour later Rick and Morgan return and they come right over to the majority of the group. Surprisingly he gives Morgan a can of peaches and a bottle of water. Rick then says to us all, "we will talk about this later, work it all out. For now, let's just enjoy this afternoon and rest, we are safe for now."

Daryl and I look at each other as soon as the words are out of his mouth, finally an opportunity to be alone. Daryl is over talking to Rick and back at my side, taking my own now finished, canned breakfast outta my hands, saying "come on, let's go hunting" in record time. The only people who really notice this happening are Maggie and Carol. I can see my sister evaluating the situation but luckily she goes back to cuddling a very happy Glenn, he's beyond relieved to have her back to being herself. I know she won't leave this alone though. She was always the protective older sister anyway but now that daddy isn't here to give his usual speech and warning like he did with Jimmy and Zach, she will happily take over. As for Carol, she just looks at us a sadly, if only slightly, before looking down at her hands in her lap. Even though she looks a tad down, there's still some happiness in her expression too, she cares about Daryl. Perhaps there were romantic feelings mixed in but I know at the end of the day she just wants what's best for him.

I have to hold back my squeal of joy when he offers his hand to help me up. It may not seem like much, but that sort of PDA -I guess you can call it that- from Daryl is a huge step for him. He doesn't need to tell me that he's never been as open with anyone until our moonshine shack and funeral home conversations. Or as touchy-feely. And the warmth and fullness my heart feels when I think about how far he's come recently, and the fact I may have helped him, is the best feeling in the world. Even though he's somewhere in his 30's he deserves to experience certain aspects of life that he's missed out on or feelings that weren't an option until now. After helping me up he doesn't let go of my hand, not when we reach the door, not maneuvering around trees and walker pieces. Not until we've made our way into the woods finding a spot to just, be.

And we find a spot that exists just for us. I don't care how naive or immature I sound, it's the truth. We walked deep into what was once woods, now it's only a maze of downed trees, bushes and branches. After we're a safe distance away from the tree trunks acting as walker paper weights we start looking for somewhere to sit. I don't know if we've come here to talk, just be near one another or repeat earlier...no Beth simmer down now, the fact Daryl kissed me back the first time is a big freakin deal, take it easy. I know exactly where Daryl is heading when he starts to lead me off to the side of the route we were following.

There's a huge, flat, gray rock completely untouched and uncovered by what happened last night. Over half of it is protected by a downed tree. The tree so big and so beautiful even with its roots ripped straight from the ground that it makes me momentarily sad, thinking of the loss of this beautiful piece of nature. The tree is so thick and tall that there's no way a walker could even have a hope of getting over it and if humans tried we'd have plenty of time to be able to flee or defend ourselves before anything could happen. The front of the rock that we're heading towards now, has tons of branches and other debris in the way but also has a small gap that we can get through and is big enough for us to make a quick escape if need be. How sad is it that this all has to go through both of our heads while contemplating taking a seat and simply being with one another? That's how the world is now and even though I am saddened by the loss of so many beautiful pieces of nature I'm also extremely grateful to be able to sit down and enjoy some time with him and not have to keep a constant eye on our surroundings.

Once we squeeze through the gap and start to make our way to the rock I can see that this was definitely not the only one around. Now I see other smaller ones poking out from underneath the trees. And there it is again my sadness for such a loss because now I can tell this was once a small river or stream. Not anymore, now it's empty, ruined and only filled with dead trees and dry rocks. The one in question, the one thats sitting here just for us, is huge. Daryl climbs up, stretches his legs out in front of him and then helps me up next to him. I sit facing his body, my legs crossed Indian style and think how much this reminds me of summers spent sun bathing on a similar rock back home in a nearby stream. Those memories feel thousands of miles away now. Even after both of us get comfortable or as comfortable as possible, theres still room to invite Maggie, Glenn, Carl and Judith to join us.

I immediately know that I could live on this rock, simply sitting next to this amazing man beside me, never uttering a word or moving away from each other again. But, it gets even better when my usually strong and silent partner in crime is the first of us to speak, surprising us both.

"I know that you left out some details of what happened to you and what you saw back there at the hospital. And you know I'll never force or push ya to tell me anything that you didn't want to. But, holding it in won't make it go away and won't make it better. I know firsthand bout it and how it feels like sayin nothin makes it disappear and talking about it might bring those ghosts back to life but it won't. And if you do ever want to talk about it, I know it might not even be with me but I'm here to listen. I ain't as smart or good with words as some of the others, but I'll try my best if you want to tell me. I might get it wrong or be too quiet but I care and I hope that's enough for now." He finishes by resting his hand on my knee and giving it gentle squeeze.

How the hell I contain myself from throwing my body into his and instead only place my hand on top of his own is a miracle. It's almost as unbelievable as the barn still standing in that field after the storm last night.

I was always going to tell him about what happened, probably every detail even though I know some of it will make him see red. I don't know if I can even share these things with Maggie. I don't want to, I don't want her to know some of the things I saw and some of things I did, she's been through enough already. And I don't care if he says absolutely nothing to any of my admissions. He's here and will listen to me, not judging and will simply support me, it's more than enough. The fact that he just said any of that -and now I know why he was brooding even more than usual when we walked through the woods, preparing a speech for me- just makes me fall in love with him even more.

"Thank you Daryl, thank you for saying that, you didn't need to but I loved hearing every word of it. I was, I was going to tell you and just you what happened and what I saw and what I had to do. I'm ready to do that now, I want to get it out of me, I need to start dealing with it back in the real world, back with my family. I'm not locked in the hospital anymore fighting for my life. I'm not able to just hold it in, I can't let it ruin me." I give him one last chance to say anything else, to maybe ask me to tell him another time even though I already know he won't. He simply looks at me and then nods once, squeezing my knee again.

This time I start from the true beginning and I tell him everything and I don't leave out any details. I tell him about Dr. Edwards making me give the wrong medication on purpose so I would kill that man which then led to do Noah's punishment for standing up for me. I tell him about having to hold down Joan, while they removed part of her arm because of the bite she got when she tried to scape. I tell him about having to earn not only my medical treatment and my room but my food. I finished by telling him the first thing I had to know when I woke up, was if he was there.

He takes it all in, he never once interrupting me, only nodding every now and then as if to say I'm listening go on. There are a few things I haven't mentioned yet, things that I don't really know how to get out. I didn't tell him exactly why Joan was running away, I mean from what I've said so far it's reason enough for anyone to want to get out of there. And I haven't brought up Gorman. Even though he's dead I know Daryl would want to go and find the pieces of his bones that are left and crush them. I don't have long to worry about how to tell him about these things, and it never crossed my mind not to because I know I need to be honest with him and tell someone the darkest horrors going on in there.

"How did you meet Noah?" he asks me. I tell him about finding the lollipop in my clean clothes and how I wasn't sure if it was just a kind gesture or an invitation to go find him as I did. And then it comes out before I even realize it. "I'm glad he did that. I'm glad I went and sought him out and we had made that failed plan and he got out. And he never knew there'd be repercussions of me finding the lollipop." I stopped dead after that sentence, my whole body freezing and my eyes going wide. Even though I was always going to be brutally honest with him I'm scared for his reaction, and I don't want to see him heartbroken. I know he won't see me in a different way or judge me at all but it will hurt him.

"What repercussions? What are you talking about?" he asks me quickly and intently.

"Daryl, I'm going to tell you about that but explaining the whole lollipop problem, is going to open up darker things that were going on in the hospital, that almost happened to me. I need you to prepare for that."

Daryl can say he's not as smart as others and put himself down all he wants but the man is quick as a whip and smart as hell. I only need to let that float in the air between us for mere seconds before I see it in his eyes. It clicks that I'm about to tell him something that he is going to find unbearable, something that would only happen to pretty girls like me and Joan. He sits up a bit straighter, takes a deep breath and then says, "I told you I'm here to listen and support you, go on."

Goddamnit how does he do that! This is the third time in one day I've wanted to throw myself on him like we're in a damn Danielle Steele novel. I wish we could have a cold showers in the woods! This is so not the time for this, he will be my knight in shining amor till the end of time, I will have many more chances to jump his bones.

"Well, Joan was trying to escape because there was one officer that was even worse than Dawn. His name was Gorman and he's one of the two that hit me with the car outside the funeral home." I can see already that this is affecting him, the way he's sitting ram rod straight and there's a slight tick in his jaw, but I continue. "He was the one who told me my first day about having to earn my food, he's the reason I didn't eat. He's also the one that let himself into my room when I found the lollipop and he told me it could be our little secret only after he unwrapped it and made me put in my mouth and then took it with him."

After that I can see how badly he wants to get up. I don't know where he wants to go but he has to fight with himself to stay still. "Daryl I can stop, I don't want to upset you like this please I'm fine we can talk about it later." I say to him with only love and understanding in my eyes, I refuse to make him upset.

"No Beth no, I told you I'm here and I am but you can't expect me to not have a reaction to this. If they weren't dead I'd be there murdering them sonsabitches and even now I have half a mind to go kill the survivors anyway." He pauses and looks away from me before he asks, "Were you...did they...fuck." He can't say the word and it's frustrating him but I know exactly what he wants to ask.

I can't bring myself to utter the word either but I need to reassure him so I answer without hesitation, forcing him to look me in the eyes, "NO. I wasn't, it was close not very but enough." I can see him relax but barely. I continue, ready to finish my hellish memories. "I snuck into Dawn's office for the key Noah and I needed if we wanted to escape and I found Joan. She was lying in a pool of her own blood, I knew she was gone and I had to find that key and I had to find it fast. But before I could leave Gorman walked in and he didn't buy the story I told him. I tried to think about what you would tell me to do right then so I looked over at Joan and she was starting to reanimate. I had to play along with him, wait for my chance. He started to tell me that I wasn't a fighter like Joan, I was a good girl and he started...he tried to touch me. Didn't do much like I said but it was enough. Once I saw Joan start to move, I broke a jar of those stupid disgusting lollipops over his head. He fell to the ground and Joan attacked. And I know it's not like me to say something like this but it was amazing. Not that she was dead of course, I wish that she was here with me right now and could live a happier existence for some time but I'm glad she got her revenge even after death." Even though it makes me feel like a bad person, I end my story with a small smile on my face because I am happy Gorman is dead and I'm even happier Joan did it.

Almost nervously I look over at Daryl to try and gauge his reaction. I was always surprised I could read him so well when he gives off so little. Not in this moment though, cause right now Judith could read him. His face is red, he's breathing so fast I think it's his turn to pass out and he's shaking. So finally I given and throw my arms around him but not in the way I wanted to when we first got here. This is in the reassuring and comforting way that he needs. After I throw myself into his lap, my legs straddling his waist I just sit there, my hands holding the back of his head, with my face pressed against his neck. I murmur little things, words and sentences that barely makes sense, simply telling him that I'm here in one piece, that I'm practically untouched and so much luckier than most.

We stay this way for quite a while and after I stop my murmurs of reassurance I start giving him small, soft kisses on his neck, anything to calm him down. And yeah fine sue me, I'm definitely enjoying this moment. Of course not his upsetness but wrapping my arms around him and feeling him with me here, like I never thought I'd feel him ever again has me smiling on the inside.

Soon after the kisses start, I feel his arms go around me as well. Securely on my back rubbing up and down and saying he's sorry for losing it there.

"Now you stop that nonsense right now Daryl Dixon. You've got nothing to be sorry for, I knew you'd be upset and you have every right to be but I needed to get it out and more importantly you deserve my honesty. But, right now there really is nothing you can do, he's dead every other, well hopefully every other corrupt officer in there is too. And they let me walk right out the front doors after helping me and saving my life. It may not be heaven but it's better than it was." When I'm finished admonishing him for being plain old silly I lean back and re-create our embrace from earlier, forehead forehead and give him a real smile. It might not be the happiest moment but we're sitting here together and even though he can't do anything now, all he wants to do is protect me and find revenge for me. How could I be so lucky at the end of the world?

"I think it may be your turn if you're ready to tell me exactly what happened after we were separated. You didn't say anything back there and the people who did speak up, well I know they were leaving out details too." I'd never push him even though I'm dying to know everything that happened to my family, to try and understand what they went through in their own battles and wars while we were separated.

He leans back slightly looking me straight in my eyes, he then tucks a wayward piece of unruly blonde hair behind my ear and makes fireworks go off inside of me when he gently yet deeply kisses me. "You're here, in my lap in one piece, telling me all the horrors you survived. Even if I didn't come out here with the exact goal of being honest with you I have to be now." He finishes with a smirk, slightly teasing me. I simply scratch the back of his head gently, with a small smile on my face, telling him in one of our silent conversations to go ahead, I'm here listening.

He tells me he ran for two days straight until his body collapsed beneath him, trying to find me. This of course is the only good and favorite part of his story that he tells me. I completely understand why he spent any time with Joe and his men. It was that or die and the latter option simply isn't an option. How are us humans still so corrupt when we have nothin left? The only thing that matters is trying to get a semblance of life going again.

I sit there for the good half of an hour listening about Terminus and the fact any of them are here right now blows my mind. I will have to personally thank Carol for what she did, she was so brave and she's grown so much as a woman in the years we have known her. After Terminus he slips into the conversation about her killing Karen and David. I think anyone, myself included, will be surprised to know, that I'm not mad at her in anyway. They were a threat to our group, they were past the point of no return and we knew that, we had the evidence of our other dead members to prove that they were a lost cause, no matter how heartbreaking that fact is. Carol is way past the point of losing everything and then the few precious people she had left were being threatened. I just wish that more of us had been that brave. I know it's controversial and I'm not condoning murder and I know that certain people in the group will never understand but I feel as though some of us are still only because she got rid of a small yet deadly threat. I didn't want to interrupt any of his recollections of what's happened but I tell him this, I have to. He takes in what I've said and mulls it over before he says, "I agree. I never could've done it but I agree."

He tells me more details of Bob's horrible death and also why I never felt right about Gabriel even though he was a man of God just like my father. He tells me about him and Carol in Atlanta and Noah trying to rob them and getting his own back which makes me smile. Bless him. Noah may have been forced to do nothing but laundry for a year now but regardless he's brave and he's still a good person who is learning to be stronger.

Daryl takes me completely by surprise when he starts to recollect the events and feelings after Dawn shot me. "Bitch was shot dead and bleeding before I even realized I had done it. But I had to. She killed you or I thought she had. And right then, every tiny bit of spark, hope and happiness in the world was gone and she had to fucking go with it." He ends his recollections fiercely, I can practically see fire in his eyes. Holy crap on a cracker, I think he may just love me back.

So, with that thought taking up every crevice of my mind I kiss him. I kiss him with just as much ferocity as I just saw him express for me. I'm shaking with nerves on the inside, scared to push too much, too fast. But those nerves quickly turn into butterflies when he growls into my mouth and pulls me closer.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello lovelies! Sorry I've been slacking on updating. My daughter had a big test she needed done in regards to her health so it hasn't been a great week. But she should be fine so I'm trying to get back in the swing of things. Hope you enjoy and thank you as always to my amazing reviewers you guys are the best. Xo**

Holy fuckin shit. I've been missing out. I never thought kissin was that great or important but right now every walker on the goddamn planet could walk right up to us and I wouldn't give a fuck cause I've never felt this good. Beth's strong, little warm body placed firmly in my lap, wrapped around my neck is definitely helping the good feelings but honestly her kiss is the best fuckin thing to exist before and after the turn. For some reason people always think I got a lot of experience or I was always sleeping around or something, but that's not the case at all. I never really wanted to be with anyone before, it was more about proving something to Merle or the need to find some sort of release other than hunting. Of all the three people I've been with, I refused to pay for any of them. I am not my brother and really how was I going to be some Casanova when I lived at home with my abusive father, that's definitely a surefire way into someone's pants right? I never had those urges, I never just wanted to be with women to just "do it", I ain't into guys or nothin but I just had different priorities. And I sure all hell never wanted to have all the disgusting side effects of not being safe either, little Daryl was always wrapped up tight after watching Merlin go through everything from the clap to chlamydia. I think most of my life I was just so focused on not becoming my father or my brother, being my own person. Even if I followed Merle around I stayed clean and never went to jail, didn't get into stupid bar fights and never did anythin harder than marijuana. Then, next thing you know the Apocalypse is upon us. And now I'm here with the sweetest most beautiful girl kissin me and wanting me, only took the end of the world.

I could stay this way forever. One of my arms securely wrapped around her waist with that hand half on her belly she's so small and my other hand gently holding the uninjured side of her head while her small tongue is fighting with mine for dominance. When she starts trailing slow kisses across my cheek, along my jaw and down my neck I realize for the first time since I was a toddler, that I feel cherished. Of course it was different all those years ago, when my my ma would sit with me in her lap on the weekends my dad would go hunting with Merle. She'd rock me back and forth, tell me stories and kiss the top of my head. It took over 30 years but I'm finally having the most intimate experience of my life, so far. When Beth starts to slightly move herself over my lap I bring my mouth back to hers, give her one final deep kiss and pull away. This is not the place or time, I will not rush this part of us with her. Us, Jesus, may be getting ahead yourself Dixon. I don't even know what her experience level is and she's so much fuckin more than sex to me. But the feelings I'm having right now with her so close, in a way I'm never been with a woman before is too much and I have to stop now. Stop this while my brain will still let me.

"Beth how's your head? All you have is that bandage but is that all that's wrong, I mean you were..." I can't finish that thought let alone the sentence. I know she's here, alive but she was fucking shot and I can't lose her again cause of this.

"Well Dr. Edwards said there wasn't anythin else he could do and didn't see any reason why I would get worse now. He removed the bullet and inspected the wound as best as he could. There were no fragments left behind and he said me waking up at all, with no memory loss is the best thing that could've happened." She tells me while looking down, I don't want to make her relive this again but I had to know.

I pull her in for what I've heard people call a bear hug, my body engulfing hers, trying to comfort her. Beth let's out a huge breath and hugs me back just as tight.

"I'm sorry Beth, but I had to know, I'm worried which ain't something I'm used to. I just got you back and I need to make sure I do everything I can to keep you here and safe." I tell her, caressing her face.

"I'm not goin anywhere Dixon, you're stuck with me. And I will take it easy, I don't want to make myself regress. But I want to help more, I'm not that dead girl everyone thought couldn't make it. I have made it, twice now. I love Judith and will do anything for her and will help take care of her, just not 24/7 anymore. I can go on runs and hunt with you when you don't mind. I'll be telling Rick this soon by the way." She tells me, looking me straight in the eyes and I know she means business.

"Trust me, I ain't stuck with you. After the hospital, I felt like giving up and I got pretty damn close, I shut down. Now that you're here I'll never waste another second with you. And I agree you should help more, you're strong, brave and a quick learner. Plus, I ain't going on no runs without you, I don't want you outta my sight so that means hunting too. I'll talk to Rick for you if you want or just be there." As soon as I finish speaking we're kissing again, her way of saying thank you.

"I'm glad you didn't let go and held on till I got here. I would be the same if I lost you but that's not going to happen ever again. And I think I should talk to Rick but with you there, I don't know how they'll all take me doing more. But enough chit chat let's see if we can hunt down dinner!" Beth tells me with a blinding smile on her face then she starts to remove herself from my lap. But I tug her down, there's one thing we haven't talked about.

"Wait, I uh think we should talk about something else before we go back." Fuckin hell I thought the girl was supposed to want to talk about feelings and labels and shit? Now I have to try and ask her things and say stuff I ain't ever even thought I would in my whole damn life. She just looks at me, head titled and nods for me to go on. "I think we should talk about us, I mean if you even want there to be an us. Some of em could already tell there might've been something between us but just wondering what you want and what you wanna tell the others." I get it all out as fast as possible, don't even know if I'm making sense.

And that girl she has the nerve to laugh at me. "Daryl, of course there is an us, well I want there to be. I've never felt this way about anyone before, so happy, confident and our chemistry it takes my breath away. But I don't want to push you or make you uncomfortable by saying you're my boyfriend. I know it's soon but I'm not going to want anyone else, ever. I'm not a kid or naive, I know feelings like this are rare. I sure as hell don't care about the age difference. I'm going to be twenty soon, in August whenever that is. How old are you anyway?" She asks me, genuinely curious.

I would've had my birthday when we were together most likely, it's January 15th never a day I celebrated. It does bother me the age gap, it's not the only problem but it's a factor. I'm old, used, broken and she's too good for me. "I'm 36, my birthdays in January." I tell her, my stomach rolling thinking about how this might be a deal breaker, regardless of what she just said.

"We missed your birthday! I mean I know we can't celebrate the exact day not knowing and all but still we could've done something." Beth exclaims, truly peeved.

I laugh the biggest and most genuine laugh in years. I tell her I could be her damn daddy -a teenage one but still- and she's only upset we didn't dedicate a jar of pigs feet to me in honor of the big 3-6. "16 years your senior and you're worried about my birthday celebrations? Damn I'm a lucky man to have found such a crazy woman." I tell her before kissing her full on the mouth. She breaks our kiss to continue our conversation.

"Well I'm going to take the crazy thing as a compliment. No matter how cheesy, age IS just a number, end of the world or not I'm mature and level headed. We both know I can't handle grumpy Daryl and you can be sweet as pie when I need it. Plus you're strong, brave and took care of me. Honestly it's kinda hot that you're older, a real man. As for the others, if they have a real issue with this and aren't simply fighting it because they feel as they should, well then they don't matter. How can you do anything besides support two people who are your family when they've found happiness?" I can see her getting heated towards the end and I know she will fight for us. Quietly she adds, "I mean if you want a relationship, I meant what I said I won't force labels onto us. I want you and only you." Beth tells me much more timidly. Is she scared I'll say no? Crazy girl.

"Glad you took crazy as a compliment cause you really are. How could I want...need anyone else? I ain't ever wanted someone to be mine, not once, until you. I'm not looking forward to your sister's reaction, been preparing for my black eye but you're right, anyone who doesn't support us don't matter." I tell her, hoping she's reassured.

"Yeah, Maggie. I mean she wouldn't be happy with anyone, no ones good enough for her baby sister. And she needs to take over from daddy with the talk and threatening angle he always played. But she's calmed since Glenn and I know daddy would've been happy for us, might've taken a while but he always liked you. If I know that Maggie does too so she'll come around." What she says next takes me completely by surprise. "I have to be honest, I'm nervous about Carol finding out." Fine, I guess I should have seen it coming.

"Don't be Beth. She's the first real friend I ever had, someone who put up with my shit and still showed me kindness. But she's like a sister to me I've never felt that way for her. Shit I haven't felt that way towards a woman since way before the dead started walking. And yeah she might feel differently about me but it's nothing that deep, she's never even brought it up. She'll be okay and she would never act out because of disappointment or whatever she may feel." I try and make her feel better yet again, but damn am I ever outta my comfort zone. All she says is "okay" but she looks more relaxed and happier now.

I can't help asking, "so uh how many threatening talks did Hershel have about you?" I know about Jimmy and Zach but are there others? Damn Dixon, jealous of dead kids, good one.

"Just 2. Jimmy and I dated for a while and I was 16 so not much time for other dates. And then Zach of course but you know that." I feel better after she tells me, I can't stand the thought of another man touching her, kissing her even making her laugh. Jealously, another new emotion for me and this one sucks. "Your turn, how many ladies have there been?" She asks and I can tell I'm not the only jealous one.

"Well I ain't ever had a girlfriend. Only ever spent the night with 3. That's all it ever was for us both, the night." I'm not sure if this will make it better or worse but almost immediately she starts running her hands back through my hair with a smile on her face. A good sign, I hope.

"Okay then. I can deal with that." She tells me.

"Alright good, me too. Now, time to find dinner." I say to her as I help her to stand. Holding her hand and then resting my hand on her waist once we are off the rock, I feel like I have to touch her all the time.

We walk in a comfortable silence as we go slightly deeper into the woods. It's been almost an hour and I know we'll have to call it a day and head back soon, empty handed. The sigh I'm about to let out gets stuck in my throat when Beth squeezes my arm hard. There, a mere 15 feet away from us is a good sized doe. She looks disorientated, probably forced away from her usual area by the storm. A part of me feels almost bad for aiming my loaded crossbow at her heart, that Greene girl IS changing me. But there's no room for empathy these days, it's her or us. Taking a deep breath in, I pull the trigger with its release from my lungs. I hit my target perfectly and we make our way over to start the gutting process. I'll skin it closer to the barn but the more blood and innards I can leave here the better. Just as I'm finishing up we both hear the shuffle and groans of a walker. Before I can even drop the doe I hear it hit the ground and turn to see Beth pulling her knife out of its skull. Her having my back, protecting me, plus seeing her taking in big breaths, sweat dotting her forehead from such an act...if only my hands weren't covered in blood. I turn back to the task at hand when her head turns my way, realizing I've been caught staring.

No other interruptions and we're on our way back to the barn. This time we fill the space with idle chit chat as Beth calls it. She likes to learn everything she can about me, why that is I have no idea. But it means she shares stories and memories too and I'm fascinated by her so I'll tell her whatever I can if it means she'll keep talking. And I know she will tell me anything I ask without so much as a nod in return but honestly I like telling her about me. Mine might not be happy or funny but I want her to know, and she never tells me to stop.

All too soon I can see the outline of the barn coming up ahead. Subconsciously, we both slow down, not wanting our time together to end. I look over at Beth and ask her, "Can you go inside and grab Tyrees for me? He can skin the deer." She simply nods, smiles and goes inside. A few seconds later Tyrese comes outside with the biggest smile I've seen since everything happened with Bob.

"Great job man! Can't believe you found that, tonight will be a good night. You go inside and take a break I got this. You two have been gone for hours." He tells me turning to his task at hand.

I knew Beth and I had been out there for a good two hours but maybe it was more since people are noticing. I walk in to the barn and almost every head turns in my direction, not only because I walked in but because Beth is instantly at my side handing me a half-eaten can of beans and then leads me over to some of the crew and we sit down. Half an hour later Tyrese and Rick, who went to go out and help him, come inside with the deer. We decide to cook it all and split it up over the next couple of days while it stays good. Once Rick is back inside he addresses everyone in the barn, "Okay guys, we have a lot to go over and I want to get this done so we can have our dinner, thanks to Daryl and Beth. I want us to have a plan so we can get out of here in the morning. First of all, Morgan I have talked everything over and though our history has always been up-and-down, I'm happy for him to join us. He's a strong man and he's been fighting since this whole thing started. He'll be a good ally and the fact that he helped bring Beth back to us, well, we can trust him. However, we all have to be as comfortable as possible, nothing can get in the way of us being safe out there. So if anyone has a real issue or problem with Morgan joining our group, speak up now and let's see if we can either work through it or come to a new decision." Rick tells us awaiting our responses.

Everyone starts turning to look at each other, I see apprehension in people's eyes but no one speaks up. That is until Beth.

"Guys, please don't keep your concerns or thoughts to yourself because he helped me. I'm of course on his side and even if he hadn't heled me and we had just met yesterday I can tell he's a good man. He's been through a lot horrible things but he's come out the other side standing. But, you cannot hold your true feelings inside and like Rick said let those feelings get in the way of our safety and journey." When she's done it's Glenn's turn to speak up for the group.

"We're not against him, well if I can speak for the group. It's just always hard to bring on new people and we've had more issues than not but I really want to try to trust someone. I don't think any of us want to banish him to this world alone. Maybe we could do some sort of a probationary period? Like we used to do when you got a new job. If anything goes wrong in the next month together we reevaluate the situation?" I got to give it to the man he has a good point and a good idea. Plus it's fair. I can see not only Rick but Morgan slightly nod.

It's Morgan who speaks first. "Well I think that's a very fair idea and a good idea. I don't expect you guys to welcome with open arms and without a second thought. You guys have a good thing going here, you're strong you trust each other and most importantly you get long which has to make life on the road easier or living in tight quarters." Rick looks relieved that Morgan was the first to speak up as the last thing he wants is a fight.

"Yes I do agree, thank you Glenn that's a very good idea and thank you Beth for being so honest. We're all so happy to have you back but you're right we do need to make sure we're thinking straight before making decisions." Rick says.

After that, some of us start to disperse to go and start making our fucking amazing dinner. God I can't wait to have some meat. The only people left to start brainstorming ideas Rick, Beth, Tyrese, Maggie, Glenn, Michonne, Abraham and myself. I guess this is our new little counsel and I'm glad that everyone simply gave Beth a small look of approval with a smile, accepting her. I will still be with her later when she talks to Rick because she will have to talk to him one-on-one about what she wants but this is a good start. We take out the map, and even though we don't know exactly where we are I can take a pretty guess. We're obviously in the woods, pretty rural but I think we're a few miles outside of a small town I remember Merle talking about once. He wanted to go because everyone there was fucking loaded. Unfortunately, there's mostly woods all around and any other town or neighborhood that would be of any help is a good distance away and we don't want to set up shop there anyway. I suggest that when we had out in the morning and we go into the woods, this will lead us towards the back area of where the houses and town would start.

You never know what you find out there, another moonshine shack or someone's old empty hunting cabin, just because it was rich territory doesn't mean that people didn't find ways to have their own little hideaways kept secret. If not, well maybe we can clear out somewhere for the night at least. Everyone agrees but Rick then suggests that perhaps we leave just as the sun rises and if we haven't found anywhere by just after noon we head back to the barn. It is a good idea, we could find nothing at all out there and this huge group in the woods with no cover would not be a good idea. Also, I think we're all scared to leave this barn after so many amazing things happened here, us surviving the storm and of course having Beth come back to us. But we do need to find bigger and better things and we will. We've been through so much shit, so many back-and-forths and ups and downs that we can get through this and find somewhere just for us. Once we decide on watch shifts for the night Rick tells the group of our decision and tells them to be ready to go just before dawn.

And finally it's time to eat. Holy shit! Canned green beans and fresh deer meat has never tasted so fucking good. We all eat in complete silence wrapped up in our first real meal in ages. We are all sitting around glowing in the aftermath of a good dinner when I see the moment start to happen. Beth is already next to me, that will never change but feeling her hand on my leg makes me look at her and then turn my head to see what's caught her gaze. Oh shit, Maggie. She's walking over here with determined strides and a very calm look on her face. That scares me more than if she had steam coming out of her ears.

"Hi you two, Glenn's on watch duty right now so you want to come with me for a little walk outside?" Even though she says this sounding sweet as sugar, the look in her eyes makes my stomach drop to the floor. Oh boy here we go...


	10. Chapter 10

**What, I'm alive?! Guys I don't even know what to say, I can list the million things that have been going on since I last updated but at the end of the day I suck for waiting so long. Having my first full-time job since giving birth five years ago was a big wake up call but people are still reading this and I'm getting alerts and reviews and I miss this story! So I hope you can forgive me and I hope that there's some of you still out there reading because here's Chapter 10 (it's looong) and Chapter 11 is already started. Again let me know what you think, what you want to see and I really hope you enjoy. Xoxo**

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Oh no, already Maggie? I know we both just talked about this happening and I've been waiting for it since I left the hospital but I just don't know how this is going to end. I know the age thing and how Daryl and I couldn't be more different will affect people and how they see us. But she's my sister, she loves me and I know she just wants what's best for me and wants to make sure I'm happy. And he's a good man who makes me beyond happy, so will that be enough to keep her calm?

We both follow her outside past a half timid half laughing Glenn. Once we've headed around the corner of the barn and we're out of ear shot she begins.

"Now, I had a feeling this is what was goin to happen. I've been watching the usually emotionalless Daryl war with himself for over a week now and it did nothing to help my broken heart. I know for fact he's the only other person that can understand how I felt the minute you walked in that door Bethy. And Beth I know you and I have things to talk about, I'm not ready to do that yet I hope that you can give me some time. But, I can see the one thing that can't wait is this, whatever this is. So are you guys together now, in a relationship?" She asks us.

"Yes we are, we are together and we're ready to tell the group. You're right, we do have things to talk about and I'm not ready to deal with that either, I just want to enjoy being back with everyone first." I tell her

"Well, I am a little shocked that you two are boyfriend and girlfriend now. You're very different and I know there's an age gap but I don't really care about that. All I care about Dixon is my sister. I care about her safety and her happiness. No matter what she's been through recently she is still walking around here with hope in her eyes and a smile on her face and I know it's not just because she survived and found her way here, it's because she found you again. That's enough for me, that along with the fact that daddy always respected and always liked you. I know that he saw what a good man you were, sometimes even talked about how he hoped you'd find your place even more so in the world and find some happiness because he thought you were one of the best men he ever met. And we've all watched you grow and become calmer, you might not be a puppy but you're a changed man and growing into the person you're supposed to be. But I will take your crossbow and kill you with it if you ever hurt her or if you ever let your natural manly stuff get in the way of you two. Just promise me to talk it out, to work through it. Holding it in and making assumptions just starts trouble, it's not worth it. Beth I'm just glad you found a man who looks at you with the way Glenn looks at me. You deserve that."

By the time she's finished speaking both of our mouths are hanging open. I was hopeful and optimistic that she would take this better than I was first thinking she would. But this? Practically giving us her blessing to be together? She must be really happy to have me back or this is what true love is. You simply want the best for them, even if you might not agree with it.

All I do is nod, partly because I'm in shock but mostly because I don't want to say too much and make her change her mind. And then even more surprising than Maggie's entire speech just now is the fact that Daryl starts speaking.

"I'll make sure Beth teaches you how to use my crossbow so you can use it to kill me if I ever hurt her because that's the one thing I never want to do and I will never will do. I'm trying to talk more, be open minded and not shut down. She's changing me even more now and not in a forced way but like you said helping me to become who I'm supposed to be. I'm liking the change and I have to say I'm glad I'm here with all my body parts and no black eye. This means a lot to both of us that you're okay with this and that you say that your daddy would've been as well. He's the toughest sonabitch and the best man I'm ever met in my entire life." He's talking to Maggie but by the last sentence he's holding my hand. I could cry myself to sleep every night thinking about my daddy being gone and how he was taken. But this world is so tough and awful and part of me is glad he can be with my momma again, happy and safe.

Maggie smiles and gives us both a big hug and Daryl doesn't even tense up.

"Okay then let's head back in there so we can get ready for tomorrow morning." She tells us before we all walk around the barn together but it's no surprise that she stays outside with Glenn as we head inside.

Once back inside the barn, Noah comes up to me and asks if he could talk to me. I don't like being away from Daryl but I know Noah needs this, part of me does too. I was overjoyed to see him still with the group, he survived, they accepted him but we definitely have things to catch up on. As he leaves us to talk, I see Carol motion to Daryl to come up to the second level of the barn. One person on the door and one person looking out the window up top is enough coverage for us. He quickly glances at me and I can't be selfish, I have to trust what he told me earlier. I nod and smile then focus my attention on Noah.

"Beth I'm sorry I kept running that day I got out and you didn't. Part of me wasn't thinking, I was acting on instinct when a smaller part of me thought that I would have a better chance of doing something for you if I got out, looked for weapons and found anybody that would help. And I should've asked you about your group, if I had known who they were I would've talked to them instead of trying to rob their things and then Carol getting hurt. I feel like crap about it. I don't even know why they let me join the group I've been nothing but trouble. Virginia was a bust, I don't even have two working legs but I know that if I want to live and I want to survive I have to try and try hard. I was almost completely decided to embrace being alive but seeing you and having you come back sealed the deal for me. There is a reason to keep moving and keep living and I hope that your group can learn to trust me more along the way." Noah tells me and I can tell he's nervous about my reaction and what I'm going to say. Bless his heart.

"Noah, I'm so happy to hear that you've decided to keep trying. You me and Morgan really are kindred spirits that way but I know it's harder for you two having lost everything. And I want to tell you how unbelievably sorry I am that Virginia was gone and I'm sorry about your mom, I know how it is to be an orphan, it really sucks. But you're right, we're here right now, alive. We have to keep on going we have to make the best of this. We've been granted something so amazing, so precious that many people have lost over the past few years. Life. We just have to make the most of it. And the group they will accept you even more but it just takes time to trust people. But I have to be honest, I felt nothing but happiness when you got out of there that day and you did help save me and bring me back to Daryl. I have to thank you for that." I finish by giving him a small one armed hug.

We get up and go our separate ways, Noah going over to Sasha and striking up a conversation which she seems grateful for, any distraction now is good for her. And I set off to find Daryl. Right before our conversation was ending I could see his and Carol's also coming to an end and him heading out the door.

I approach my brother-in-law, "Hey Glenn, which way did he go?" I ask, Glenn simply smiles and points to his left. "Thanks." As I make my way around the left side of our shelter, I wonder why he felt the need to completely leave the barn? There he is leaning against the farthest corner of the barn. I walk up to him and lean against the wall beside him, my arm is pressed against his and I lay my head on his shoulder.

"Everything okay?" I ask him.

He takes a deep breath before he says, "well you know I ain't much for talking and when I do I really only like to talk to you so that wasn't my shining moment just now. But nothing happened, you were more right than I was. Carol is a little disappointed, I could see the sadness in her eyes. I feel bad more so because I wish I had known sooner she had any feelings like that so I could've dealt with them before now. I never wanted her to feel hurt but even if I had never met you there would be nothing like that with her, she's a friend, she's a true family member. She's okay though, she's more happy for us than anything, says that you're good for me. I thought I was the only one who would ever be able to see that but I'm glad all of our family and friends can notice how good you are. How you're helping me, how I'm becoming a better man cause of you. I think it'll take a while for her to be comfortable watching us together but she needs to find her own reason to live. This seems like a new thing in our group. If you could do it all those years ago, Morgan now and Noah as well then her and Sasha can find their way too."

Wow, I thought it might be like pulling teeth to get the conversation with Carol out of him but he just laid it all out for me. I know he won't always be this open but I think he could see something weighing on my mind and just wanted to make me feel better. I love that man and I have to make sure I don't tell him that yet because he might have a heart attack and then we will all be screwed.

"Thank you for telling me. I've always liked Carol and I don't think she'll hold it against me. I hope she doesn't because I'd love to talk to her and catch up on everything that's happened. Plus, explain to her what what went on in the hospital." I tell him.

Daryl nods and then pauses for a long moment before he looks at me out the corner of his eye and asks, "what about you? What was all that with Noah?"

Oh my gosh he is jealous again! And of Noah? Never, it never even crossed my mind that he would look at me that way and I definitely never looked at him that way. For heaven's sake we were trying to escape the hospital in one piece and then trying to survive in our own ways after that.

"He just feels bad about what happened you know, he got out and I didn't. And of course as anyone would be he's really worried about the group, how you guys will accept him or not accept him, fully. But its good we spoke, he's definitely at the crossroads I was at back on the farm and he's choosing to keep going. Like you said him and Morgan now and next Sasha and Carol will need to make that decision." I tell him, hoping two of the best women I've ever met can pull through this.

"Beth you're many many things but naïve ain't one of them. I don't think limpy's feelings for you are the same as the ones you have for him. And it's fine, it's also fine that Eugene's eyes wonder a little too much and linger a little too long. They're all going to learn that I don't share. That you're all mine and they better recognize it. But never doubt your power over men beautiful girl because you could have anyone you want wrapped around both pinky fingers." He tells me.

I know for fact he's exaggerating. Yes I've had two boyfriends and I was always popular in high school but I highly doubt I could wrap anyone around anything, except maybe Daryl. I shake my head and tell him, "maybe my crazy is rubbing off on you. And they can feel however they want to, I only have eyes for my archer. He's all mine." I barely finish what I'm saying before my body is turned around and my back is pushed up against the side of the barn. After that we're a flurry of his hands around my waist, mine in his hair, mouths meeting, teeth clashing and tongues warring. It's over all too soon but this is just not the place or time for a make out session, unfortunately.

We pull apart both completely breathless and he tells me very quietly and almost shyly, "I like bein all yours, I ain't ever been anyone's before."

My heart breaks for him, not in pity never in pity. I know he doesn't want anyone to feel bad for him. The reason my heart breaks is because I just know he deserved so much better and I'm sad that he had people around him that couldn't see the amazing man in front of them. He overcame all of that and is so strong and has become so trusting and kind. Daryl is an invaluable part of our family and I just want to make up for the lack of care and love in his life.

"Well then its a good thing you like being all mine because I don't ever plan on letting you go. Like I said you're stuck with me, and a few more weeks of my incessant talking and annoying singing, let's see how happy you are to be mine then." I finish teasing him, hoping to lighten the mood. It partly works, he looks me in the eye and gives me one of his small smirks.

"I don't think there will ever be a jukebox around again and even if there is one day I won't be getting one. You're my little songbird, I was just too miserable and pessimistic to enjoy it before." He tells me. I have to say, admitting he likes my singing is just another perk to this amazing day.

"Whenever I'm not being a beacon for walkers, I'll sing to you anytime. Now let's head back in before it's your turn on watch. Can I come sit with you when it is?" I ask him, I understand if he says no, our safety is more important than my need to be around him but a girl can hope right?

"You're asking? I thought you'd just follow me out and not give me a choice in the matter just how I like it." And now the small smirk turns into a full out Daryl Dixon grin and my oh my if it doesn't make muscles inside of me clench that have never clenched this deliciously before.

As we head back towards the door I reminded him that I want to speak to Rick and ask if he wouldn't mind getting him for me while I gather my thoughts. He of course agrees and once we're inside he gives my hand a gentle squeeze before heading off towards Rick. All too soon they're back by my side in the most private area we could possibly get inside a barn full of other people.

"Is everything alright Beth, you wanted to speak with me?" Rick asks me looking genuinely concerned.

I take a deep breath before I say, "yes everything's fine Rick and thanks for talking to me, I know today's been a crazy one to say the least. I actually wanted to talk to you now sooner rather than later about my place in the group. First of all, please know that I love Judith as if she was my own and I will always be there for her to watch over her and take care of her in anyway she'll ever need me to be. However, I realized once I got out of the prison with Daryl that I needed to learn more skills than I knew and that once I started learning more I caught on pretty quick and I could take care of myself. I stayed alive inside that hospital and I even got Noah out of it and then I found my way to you with the help of Morgan. I can't go back to just being her babysitter anymore Rick. I love her and she means to me the world to me but I need and want to do more for the group. I'm good at killing walkers and Daryl had already started training me with his crossbow and I'm picking up the tracking even quicker. I don't want this to be a fight and I don't want anything to make our reunion any less happy but I had to be honest." I finish telling him everything I feel and everything I want and then hold my breath waiting for his response. Before he can give one the amazing man standing to my right speaks up first.

"I've seen it myself Rick. She's strong and brave and she's a little spitfire. She can take care of herself and she was doing real well taking in everything I was teaching her when we were alone. I've seen it with my own eyes and you know that I wouldn't stand here and put the group in danger by letting her take over more responsibility than she could handle. And might as well tell you now that I refuse to go on any runs or hunting trips without her. I ain't letting her out of my sight again, not for any long period of time." He tells Rick and then his chest puffs out like they're going to battle each other. I have to hide my giggle.

Rick looks between us both at first very seriously and soon after his expression softens and he simply smiles before he says. "Well Beth, I'm glad, I'm glad you're back and that you want to do more. I hope you know I always want you to be there for Judith, she has a new bond and an amazing family member in Tyrese but you will always be her first caregiver. But you're right, you're stronger, braver and smarter than any of us ever gave you credit for and I think that's partly because we just wanted you to be safe. I know that you changed this man right here quite a bit but you've also changed all of us and help keep us hopeful and positive. So of course you can help out as much as you're comfortable with as long as it doesn't put any strain on your injury and as long as you're happy to do so. As for you brother, I completely understand where you're coming from and whenever the time comes to deal with those sorts of expeditions we'll deal with it so everyone's happy." He tells us then gives me a soft hug and Daryl a gentle squeeze on the shoulder before heading off to Michonne and his children. Is there something going on there? I hope so!

The rest of the night speeds by quicker than any of us are ready for. Luckily my watch with Daryl was extremely quiet, only two walkers that didn't make it too far past all the downed trees were the only disturbance. Other than that there was just a lot of cuddling and enjoying each other's company. I don't think we uttered one word to each other because it wasn't necessary, simply sitting there resting against each other's bodies was enough. After it's our turn to rest for a couple of hours we are all on our way, the supplies are split up between us all and we head off into the woods hoping for the best. We only walked for about four or five hours before we see it, a building hidden in the woods.


	11. Chapter 11

**I'm trying to make-up for lost time here guys but I won't be able to update this much all the time. Chapter 12 is started and I will post it this weekend or today I'll see how my day goes. My daughter is just getting through pneumonia so it's couch days for us. Let me know what you think my lovelies! Xoxo**

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To me and probably only me it looks like something out of a storybook. Daryl, Glenn, Maggie and myself volunteer to go and clear out the building. Once we're closer I can see it's an old stone building covered in moss and vines and only has two floors. There are huge windows spaced out around the entire area of it but the bottom of the windows don't start till probably about 15 feet off the ground which is a plus. They're odd windows, not only because of how huge they are but the glass looks extremely thick and there is a thin metal covering part of it. Luckily the holes in the covering are big enough for us to see through. The door is much like the windows and it looks heavy, it must be an old lead door. Glenn bangs on it with the back of a shotgun as hard as he can and we don't hear anything but through that door whatever's inside might not have been woken up by the sound. We head inside with Daryl leading us, keeping our eyes peeled, suddenly there's a small sound to our left and Glenn's on the ground with a dusty looking walker on top of him. Maggie has killed it and is dragging it off of him in record time but it's just too dark in here we'll have to do something about it.

We clear out the bottom floor and the top floor with only one other walker who's trapped under a table in the small kitchen. The boys take the bodies outside and go to get everyone else while Maggie and I see what we can do about the lighting in here. There's some huge thick sheets hanging from the top of the windows and are covering at least half of them. Once someone can pull them loose it'll be much better in here. As we wait for the group to come we try and figure out what the heck this place was. And then I find it, an old newspaper clipping in a broken frame. This was a small, family-run jam factory. There were quite a few back in the day. For jam, like here and also paper, and a good amount for cigarettes. Unfortunately before the end of the world was the end of the economy and many many businesses like this were forced to shut down and that must be what happened here. There's not much left, no machines or anything like that, only large, long tables and quite a few chairs on the bottom floor with two offices towards the back that have a desk and two chairs in each. The second floor must have been for the owners and office personnel while the bottom level was mostly for the jam making. On the second floor, the offices are much larger than the others. Two have a desk and two soft yet worn chairs and the others a love seat and sofa respectively. Plus, there's also a little kitchenette area (where we found the other walker) and a line of lockers.

The two walkers that we found must have either owned this place or worked here because they knew where it was and were trying to set up camp, given the left over supplies. There's some canned food and bottled water in the kitchen and four lockers are crammed with blankets, extra clothes, bags, a small pot and one of them has six kerosene lanterns. I wonder what happened to them, they obviously died from some sort of natural causes. I feel bad for them but I have to believe everything happens for reason and now we can survive longer because of finding not only the safety of this building but their leftover supplies. I said to quick thanks to them and God.

Once everyone comes in downstairs they're in awe. There's so much room we won't be on top of each other all the time. Plus, there's only two ways in or out. The huge door we came in through and a small newer door with an exit sign above it that must've been for emergencies. We decide that door will be our preferred way to get out of here if need be and then start setting out and finding our own spaces before securing the place. We decide to put enough people in groups so that we can each share one of the offices and no one has to sleep out in the main floor or in the kitchen. Of course my sister and her husband take one of the offices on the bottom floor and the one next to it goes to Carol and Sasha. Eugene, Tara, Rosita and Abraham take one of the bigger offices upstairs, another one goes to Rick Carl Judith and Michonne which puts a smile on my face. Tyrese, Noah and Gabriel may seem like an odd group but they agree to make the second last a "man cave" with a small laugh from Tyrese, while Gabriel just looks uncomfortable and Noah is just happy to be here at all. That leaves two more people and one office upstairs, the one on it's own next to the kitchen for me and Daryl. He grabs my hand and leads me over to it and I have to stop myself from doing a victory dance. We got the office with the couch, we lucked out. It gives me butterflies to be alone with him in here but not one of them is nerves, it's all excitement. I mean I don't really want my first time to be in a dingy office in an old jam factory but I need to talk to Daryl about that next step. I don't want to wait, I can't wait much longer.

After we all settle quickly into our new abodes, it's time to secure the building. After the sheets have been removed from the windows, the tables pushed in front of the big door or spaced out downstairs it was then time to prepare our escape route. Thank goodness they decided to get something new in this building and the door was sturdy and thankfully not broken. We tried to camouflage the outside of it as much as possible and made sure there was a clear path to get to it. Lastly, Daryl went to round up all the lanterns that we had found. In addition to the six inside the locker there were two more next to the small group of belongings the once upon a time survivors had used. Unfortunately they had been knocked over and shattered. But that paled in comparison to the fact that the other six are in perfect condition, even if they are dusty. I would gladly be covered in dust myself when Carl produces the next finding, kerosene and a pack of wicks for the lanterns. Looks like they weren't here for long at all before they passed.

The new counsel group I guess you could call us, gather round again at the end of the night, after our cold canned soup and canned peaches dinner to talk over our plan for the next day. We all know the obvious, we need supplies and will only get them from a good supply run. After looking at the map earlier Daryl said he had an idea of where we could be and that regardless of our exact location there should be some sort of a small town nearby and if it wasn't completely looted we could hopefully find something, anything.

Most of the group started to go to their respective rooms before we finished completing the plan for tomorrow, they got a general idea of the day's plan but I understand their exhaustion and need to retreat to their own space. It was pitch black outside by the time we had our exact strategy ready for the morning and towards the end I had to mentally remind myself to not tap my foot impatiently. But who could blame me? There's a cozy, semi-private office waiting for me and Daryl, I was ready to fly up those stairs!

Luckily with the extra people in the group it means we can have nights off of watch duty sometimes and tonight Daryl and I had our break, leaving Abe, Rosita, Michonne and Carl in charge till dawn. I don't want to seem desperate or scare him but the second Rick starts to say "night all" I'm reaching for Daryl's hand to drag him to our room. We get glances from some members who weren't aware of our relationship but I barely notice them, they're to be dealt with another time.

After mumbling the usual good night niceties we are finally at the door to our room and I can feel now his excitement and urgency to get here too. I think it'll take time for me to realize he wants me as much, if not more, than I want and need him and there's never been a better feeling. It took less than three seconds for someone, me, him, who knows, to open, shut and lock the door before I was gently pushed against it with the length of Daryl's strong, warm, muscled body pushing into mine, our mouths connecting instantly.

My hands are split between using his shoulder as an anchor and threading the fingers of my other hand into his hair. Daryl can't seem to decide where to touch or hold me, starting at my hips firmly squeezing me before drifting up to my face to hold either side of my head more gently than anyone would think is possible of him. All the while our mouths and tongues are fighting for dominance, neither of us wanting to win and for this battle to be over. This is bringing out feelings in me that I've never felt in this way, so strong so right. I'm not completely inexperienced even if I am a virgin but this heat and passion between us I honestly never thought was real, that anyone ever had or would feel like this about another person. The combination of my feelings, my thoughts, the kiss combined, dragged a low deep moan out of me as I pulled on Daryl's hair and that was it.

He paused for half a second and pulled back to look me in the eyes, all black pupils and passion before lifting me up under my ass making me instinctively wrap my legs around his waist and this time I wasn't pressed gently into the door, it was rough...I liked it, what's wrong with me? Who cares, that can be dealt with later. One growl from him and again we're kissing like this is our last chance to be together and I hope to God it's not but in this world you never know. That is a small part of my need to be intimate with him sooner rather than later, we can't promise anything anymore especially not time.


End file.
